How to Date an Older Man

Over 40 plus male interested in a youthful beauty in her 20s, but his eye candy doesn't have a clue on how to date older men.  So she acts strangely, distant, and even nervous when he talks to her. 

There really isn't anything that different when it comes to dating a man, young or old.  Of course, most personalities, social class, political views, appearance, and other things are different, but simple communication is basic.  So choose to focus on that rather than everything else that society has bombarded you with. 

"What's your name?  How are you?  What do you like to do?  Would you like to go out sometime?"  says the older gentleman.  His approach isn't complex.  The young woman can say, "Yes..." or "No..." real simple, right?  Well for some young women, they act as if there is something so different in dating an older man to the point that they worry themselves.  While out on a date, it is obvious that some are uncomfortable and lack confidence.  One can shake off feelings of worry by talking about the atmosphere, sharing details about interests, and asking questions while smiling and laughing at a joke or two.

Older men who have dated much, know how to put their dates at ease.  This is key in having a good time while on a date.  They may say something shocking to get a reaction or joke about someone standing nearby.  Most know not to stare at their dates as if they want to undress her at the moment or make statements that only make a date want to run and hide.  Men who are confident in who they are and really want to make a great impression on their young dates will take it slow.  There is no rush to be anywhere.  They have made the time to listen to a long story.  They enjoy getting to know their young beauties.

Things to consider when dating someone more mature.

1.  Don't think of him as someone so important, so smart, and so whatever else that you can't have a simple conversation with him.

2.  Forget about what you think you know about him.  Ask questions to find out more.  "What is your profession?  Can it be challenging, how so?  Do you hope to do something else in the future?  What are some things that you have accomplished in your life that you are most proud of?"  These questions and more will open up a quality dialogue.

3.  Don't assume he has dated so many sweet, nice, and intelligent women that you are less than acceptable to date someone of his social class or age.  Think: if he had so much success with women why is he still single?  He is flawed like you, so be prepared for anything.

4.  Don't say "Yes" when you really mean "No."  Before you date anyone, you should already have personal boundaries established.  Tell yourself, "I don't know this person well enough to kiss, have sex, commit to a relationship, etc."  This way you won't be caught off guard if he should attempt to persuade you to go to bed with him.  Also, don't say "Yes" to impress when you know nothing about a topic, a certain food, a location, etc.  He will find out eventually that you are lying.

5.  Talk about things that matter to you and watch his reaction.  Players will digress from serious topics.  They are more concerned about getting physical needs met and not how you feel about your job, family, and other important things.

6.  From a restaurant to a private spot to make-out, avoid going anywhere you don't feel comfortable.  The skill level of gaining a woman's trust is very good with a mature man, so good, that a young, gullible woman just might fall for anything.  So when in doubt, don't continue to go out.

7.  Stay away from conversation about your past boyfriends, jokes about mid-life, and things you know that if he was to bring up certain topics you might be offended.

The more knowledge you have about mature gentlemen, the better!  You will find that one's worries about dating someone older were unnecessary.  Tell yourself, "I am good enough to date any man of status.  I am intelligent, beautiful, and am going places in life.  I'm just as interesting, if not more, than my date.  I deserve to be heard."  Stating positive affirmations before going out on a date while viewing one's self in the mirror are empowering!

Have a great time!

Nicholl McGuire writes more tips on dating here.    

His Wife Ended the Relationship for Good Reason - He's Far from Perfect

"That is just so wrong what she did to you...you are a good guy...well, that's okay, I'm not like her," says the young woman who doesn't know any better.  She believes that because she is in the middle-aged man's life that all will be okay, but will it?  Rather than be critical or assume falsely she was a bad ex, a wise young woman would ask herself, "What did the ex-husband do to drive the poor woman insane?"  Then she would be observant of everything the man is doing and saying to her and others while making a determination whether or not she could tolerate her lover in the long-term.

The ex-wife (or wives) drove him out the family home for reasons beyond what those closest to the former couple knows.  She signed the divorce papers with good cause.  There was something wrong, terribly wrong with the man she once fell in love with and she could no longer subject herself to her former husband's abusive ways.  Abuse comes in many forms besides physical--a person can only put up with so much before the mind and body beg to be rid of The Problem. 

Often the talk of male midlife crisis comes up when an older man dates a younger woman, but what rarely is mentioned in troubled relationships is personality disorders.  You may have welcomed a broken man into your life who has yet to unveil his true colors.  From bipolar disorder to schizophrenia, there are many 40 plus men with mental issues, in addition to male midlife challenges, that are too complex to deal with for an ex-wife much less a young lover.  These men may have even stumped a few doctors over the years with all their problems.

Sometimes young women will speculate on how and why things ended in their mate's last relationship based on what he says.  However, as she learns more about his past, she discovers that there was really more to her lover's reasons for the break up than what he cared to mention.

Personality disorders aren't to be taken lightly. They can't be dismissed when they manifest themselves under great stress then stick around a lot longer than expected.  Men tend to do many unorthodox things when they can't get a grip on what is happening on the inside of their mind, body and spirit and aren't much interested in getting necessary help.  What's worse, busy people, with full schedules, don't see the signs a relative or friend is indeed falling apart.  Others choose to ignore these troubled males, because they don't want to take on yet another burden.  They say, "He will be okay...I will just pray about...I hope he doesn't hurt anyone.  Maybe he will break up with his new lady friend before she learns how he truly is."

The menopausal wife who decided to give her ex the walking papers decided to deal with her own issues apart from a troubled husband.  She refused to keep assisting someone who may have hurt her  very badly all the while refusing to change. 

The young woman might want to think twice about her older date's history before committing.  If she should make a rash decision, she may learn later that she indeed bit off more than she could chew.  If one reading this has mental issues, be honest with your partner, take necessary medications/vitamin supplements and don't expect someone to be the cure all for your emotional and hormonal issues.

For others dating older, pay attention to signs that an older man has a personality disorder by doing things like:

1.  Watching the way he looks at you.  Does his stare make you feel uncomfortable to the point that you want to get out of his presence?

2.  Do you fight with thoughts inside your mind of staying with him or breaking up?

3.  Do you often find yourself being blamed by him for things you didn't think or do?

4.  Does he frequently put words in your mouth or twist your communication?

5.  Is he controlling and forbids you to go places or see certain people?

6.  Does he fight with you about things that shouldn't matter much like a simple statement or comment to help him?

7.  Does he have subtle or bold quirks about him or strange mannerisms that others would say, "There's something not quite right with him."

Anger outbursts, silent treatment, pressure that keeps you tensed/emotional, false accusations, sneaky or unexplainable behavior, sexual problems, and frequent lying are all signs that there is definitely something wrong with a friend. 

Nicholl McGuire

Is it Really Love or Societal Brainwashing? Making Boys out of Grown Men

"If I am more concerned about the way I look and feel while making someone else happy who just so happens to be younger than me, then I am going to overlook those people and things around me that don't feed my ego--no matter how important they might be to me."  Sounds like a little crazy thinking, huh?  Well, the selfish, arrogant, mid-life male has an interesting way of reasoning why he does what he does.  "I need love, I need someone to appreciate me...and by God, I'm going to find her!"  How about thinking like this, "I am unhappy right now about many things and rather than focus on someone else or something else making me happy, I choose to focus internally on a broken me, how might I be able to fix me?"  Sometimes it is simply a trip to the doctor that helps, a moment with one's Creator, and a supportive network of others who are solving their woes.

Let's face it, we all are aging, even the young women out there, but what seems to be happening is this fight to look and feel younger is messing with many supposedly mature men's minds to the point that they are losing jobs, money, marriages, relationships with children, and more!

I have read comment after comment on various sites about 50 plus year old men finding 20 something young women "compatible, fun, sexy," etc.  It is nice to read that many men have found a compatible partner that "...gets me," so some say.  However, are they really in love or is it lust?  If we were to interview these same men who have been dating for a month, or a year or more later, will they still feel head-over-heels in like/love for their young mates?

With so much media hype about defying age, one can easily band aid one's crisis with someone or something that doesn't remind him or her, "You are getting old..." there are more than enough options.  It doesn't help matters when you don't have supportive people around you.  Older women tend to make less than uplifiting comments about aging, mature friends will joke about getting older, and even young people will tease the middle-aged about what they look like, but for some men it is no laughing matter about growing older, so they defy it by doing just about anything that says, "You still got it, man!" 

Many mature men aren't interested in young women simply because they don't want to take advantage of them, they are like daughters in their eyes.  These men consider themselves wise and aren't the least bit interested in seeking a fountain of youth.  They love their wives, appreciate their sons and daughters, and are content with who they are--gray hair and all!  Some mid-life men who aren't so blessed to have a family that is still intact, refuse to allow media brainwashing to make them feel like they ought to find someone younger to complete them, so they too opt out of the age gap dating scene. 

When one is in love, of course, age doesn't matter, flaws are of little concern, and one is enamored with all there is, beauty, brains, body--you name it!  But every now and then, the idea will pop up in a mid-life man's mind that his young partner will awake to a harsh reality.  "He just is too old for me...he isn't what I had in mind...what am I missing out on by being with him...how much longer will he be able to satisfy me sexually?  I think my parents are right, he's just too d*mn old!"

One must contemplate whether a May-December relationship is just that, meant to be only months long, rather than years.  Tricks are for kids and one who is maturing and aware that time is important, doesn't want to play any games with his life.  Yet, society plays mind games on many middle-aged men by telling them to do things like: watch games made for boys, play games made for boys, buy boys' toys, and sit amongst The Boys.  So if one is so focused on activities made for boys, where does a mature woman fit in?  She doesn't.  So off he goes with the girlfriend meant for a boy not for a man--get it?  Thinking back, what do most young adult boys do anyway?  Lust after young girls then have sex with them.  They play a sport or two, work a job, spend money on an expensive toy, drink alcohol, travel, and do it all over again tomorrow without a care--that is until the following happens:  someone says, "I love you!"  She contracts an STD, says she's pregnant, wants to get married, asks for one's money or wants to drive his car, now the adult boy is forced to become a man.  Now what he does with that young woman, during those trials, will determine how much of a man he truly is-- age is irrelevant.  "I don't know what to do...why didn't you protect yourself...who were you sleeping with...you aren't getting my money...you aren't driving my car...you're not my wife...I'm not marrying you!"  The adult boy, full of regret, plays the blame game, looks for an escape, and acts selfishly.  This is why he can't last with a woman his own age, the mind has yet to mature.  And how will it, when he constantly permits himself to be programmed by people and systems who are unsupportive of the natural aging process?

We must all take some time to question our motives, our feelings, and why we do what we do.  For some mature men, young women lose their shine after awhile, especially when some ladies can see through an adult boy's games.  They know when they are being played, and sooner or later they will either create a game of their own or bail out.  Some mature men lose their shine because they just don't get the younger women particularly the wise ones.  However, young women don't become wise overnight and neither do adult boys who still have a lot of growing up to do!  Both need time to understand who they are before they can understand one another and they must also recognize when they are being brainwashed by the powers that be.   Is he really having a male midlife?  Is she really seeking a father figure? 

In closing, men: avoid the "boys will be boys" mentality coupled with age defiance, and get real with yourself, your family, and that one you claim you love!

Nicholl McGuire is the author of many books.  She is looking to advance her virtual assistant role and small self-publishing business in the near future.  Learn more here.  Angel investors are welcome!

What He Must Be...If He Wants to Marry My Daughter Interview with Dr. Voddie Bauchman

Discourse on Theology - Perspectives of Dating from VESSELVIBE.com eMagazine on Vimeo.

What would you do - Domestic violence - Boyfriend abusing his girlfriend...

Is that Your Dad?

Age-Gap Dating: He's Old, Your Not -- So What's the Problem?

There is no age on love.  When you love someone you just do, there are no disclaimers, no shallow reasons, and no convincing oneself through affirmations!  You aren't focused on what the person looks like; rather you are more concerned with how your special someone makes you feel.  However, when the person isn't doing his or her part to make you feel special, you will begin to see flaws--all of them.  In time, the person's weaknesses become what's important rather than everything else if you don't keep things in proper perspective--you aren't perfect either!

An older man may have his own personal identity crisis due to the aging process complete with erratic hormone levels and the like.  Sometimes he takes his issues out on his youthful beauty, other times he doesn't.  Problems arise in the relationship when there is the up and down roller coaster ride of emotions that might be triggered for any number of reasons.  One day the mature man is confident in the relationship the next, he is not.  Although age might not be a factor (just yet) with the young woman, it may be an issue with him.  The young woman isn't aging as quickly as the older man.  She isn't experiencing any mid-life crisis.  She has very few, if any, unresolved issues from the past.  Her debt isn't any where near his.  Jealousy just might rear it's ugly head with some insecure, older men.

Witnesses who interact with the couple might see some things that they don't see in the couple's relationship.  If the older man is acting in ways that make the young woman consider things like breaking up, there is cause for concern.  Despite her youthful age and look, she might be feeling like the trouble of being with someone older just isn't worth it no matter how much money, notoriety or other things her older partner might have.

If you find yourself going through a myriad of emotions related to his age, think about whether dating an older man with his own set of personal hangups is really something you can tolerate long-term in addition to everything else you might be dealing with in your life.

Nicholl McGuire

When a Relative Says " No Way" to Dating the Old Dude

Not everyone in the family will be supportive of a young woman dating an older fellow.  When this happens, it makes it difficult to focus on the relationship.  Male relatives can be overprotective and even threatening when it comes to their loved one going out with the "old dude" they may even wish death upon him for coming into their young relative's life.

Any man who sincerely wants to be in a relationship with someone will fight to be with his partner, but he won't be a fool to stay when all hell is breaking lose because of his mere existence.  One would be wise to determine what type of fight will he be fighting and how long in order to stay with his young date.  He will also need to observe his young partner's mannerisms whe dealing with family. She may still be too young mentally to handle being in a relationship with a mature man and too fearful to stand up to family.

Threats of violence from the woman's family members and friends just isn't worth it although some men enjoy a challenge.  However, one would be better off waiting until the young woman is independent and away from troubled relatives.  If she is in love and genuinely cares for her older man, she must understand that he is not going to keep putting his life at risk to be with her--no matter how beautiful she might be.  Chances are a relative or friend may have warned him to go away or else.

"The old dude" is typically hated by one or a few relatives simply because he may have done some things to the young woman that she shared with relatives who were supposed to keep quiet about, but didn't.  They don't like "the old dude" for good reason even if all parties don't know what about. 

Sometimes the older man did nothing during the dating process to hurt the young lady, but just the sight of an aging man going out with the young, attractive person just might be too much to bear for some.  Thoughts might be, "What does he want with my daughter/niece/sister/cousin?  Who does he think he is showing up at my doorstep...I know his type!?"  That type might be like the one questioning the relationship, a liar, cheat, pimp, player type.  It takes one, to know one.

The couple will want to consider the family's objections; however, don't permit loved ones to dominate one's choice in a partner.  Maybe there are some things that they see in one or both individuals that are a sincere cause for concern. 

Nicholl McGuire also maintains and contributes to the blog:  Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate. and Relationship Advice.

Understand a Father Daughter Relationship Before You Date a Young Woman

If the young woman doesn't feel love from her own father, she may be a problem for you.  A good father raises his daughter to be self-reliant, spiritual, loving, etc.  If she isn't interested in being controlled, reliant on you, and has a faith, be grateful for that!  Don't fight her on it. If her dad is protective, he has good reason. Check your own relationship with your daughter or the one you never had. Could you be involved with a young woman because you really desire a quality father daughter relationship?



 

Young Woman You Wanted a Rich Man

So you decided to pursue a man with riches.  You placed yourself at the right place at the right time whether on or off the Internet.  However, now you have some thoughts about who he is and all that comes with him that aren't so positive.  Well, when this sort of thing happens; take a step back.  You will need to re-evaluate whether you are willing to compromise personal beliefs, make yourself available more than you want to, and other things to keep that rich man in your life.

There is more to life than money, but for some women, whether young or old, that is all they think about.  "How much can I get out of him?  I need this paid...what will I have to do to get him to pay for it?" These thoughts and others can create unnecessary stress.  Worrying over how to get someone to do something for you can be burdensome.  How much do you trust yourself to get what you want?  How much do you value you?  If your date is so rich, why do you feel the need to have to jump through hoops to get him to help you?  When you find yourself thinking more about his riches and less about the man himself, there is a problem--a big problem.  Sooner or later you will start to dislike who you are because you secretly feel the way you do about the rich man and his riches.  In addition, you just might lose interest in the rich man if he starts rejecting you often.  Keep in mind, he will be watching to see if you are indeed interested in him or his money like so many others do.

You may have to tweak some things about you so that you can honestly have a great relationship free of the complications that money and sex can bring.  Maybe you need to get out more, pursue hobbies, take classes, or do other things to make you more interesting.  Often young women become insecure, controlling, and rude when they feel their position in a rich man's life is being threatened.  These issues could be avoided had these women started a relationship with the rich man for the right reasons.  A rich man will also need to think about whether he wants more with his young partner in the future, because he knows that in time, there is the possibility that she might want more with him.

Being with a rich man isn't easy.  For purposes of this article, rich isn't defined by how much money a man makes only, but everything else that he has as well.  A rich man could have many assets, people around him he works with, talents, hobbies, a great personality, and more.  The wealthy man shows no evidence of being poor in much of anything.  For a young woman who doesn't have much, his lifestyle can be overwhelming and intimidating.  Immature women who aren't use to dating rich men can act strangely, rebel, and have temper tantrums like children.  If you or someone you know is acting in ways that is causing a rich date to act more like a father figure than a lover, than the relationship will most likely be headed toward a dead-end.

Embrace all that comes with the rich man good, bad, and ugly only if you are accepting of his ways, the people around him, and goods.  However, if you know that you are losing your identity and what you stand for while dating such a person, then back off.  Maybe he just isn't the answer to your prayers that you thought.

Nicholl McGuire

Age-Gap Dating: How to Know When the Younger Woman is No Longer Interesting in Dating You

The newness wears off in many age-gap relationships.  A mature date just isn't as appealing as he once was--it happens.  Money and gifts don't keep all young women interested in dating older men especially when she is use to having nice things.

When you think of the many young women who do enjoy the company of older men (at least for a season), you must also realize that many settle with them for a time until they are better able to take care of themselves.  Others may like the companionship, but not necessarily the way their men look. As for other young ladies, they just haven't met a charming guy their own age--yet.  But for the young women who no longer like or want to be around their older men, they will act subtle or quite boldly about how they truly feel about them.

1.  She frequently makes up excuses not to go out with him.

2.  She isn't much interested in his conversation and frequently looks away, answers her cell phone, or strikes up a conversation with others just so that he will stop talking.

3.  She ignores him when he calls.

4.  She badmouths about him to his face and behind his back without remorse.

5.  She isn't interested in being in the same room with him.

6.  She expresses little or no interest in his hobbies like she once did.

7.  She doesn't smile much around him.

8.  She is very guarded about sharing her private life and feelings.  For instance, she talks about others' thoughts/ideas/activities, but rarely shares how she feels about too much of anything.

9.  She stops asking her date/boyfriend to buy her things.

10.  She shows little, if any, affection toward him and doesn't act very responsive toward him when it comes to sex.

If you are a woman reading this and can relate to many of these signs, chances are you just don't like your date much, it would be best to make plans and move on.  If you are a man reading this and really desire to keep your young lady friend around, step up your game and ask her does she really want to be in a relationship with you!

Nicholl McGuire  

On Breaking Up with Younger or Older Partner - You Can't Get Away that Easy or Can You?

When you had your problems and your date had his or her's, you were there.  When loneliness was getting the best of you, that's when your lover came along.  When life was such a bore, your new friend brought excitement.  In the beginning, it was nice.  He grew to love you, treated you so sweetly.  She was beautiful, charming, and gave you butterflies like in a teenage romance.  But now?

It can be difficult to break up with someone who might still have a way of luring you back into his or her life even when you know he or she is no good for you.  Your partner may have been a true friend when no one seemed to care.  However, sometimes things go stale in relationships, because people change.  From childbirth to unresolved issues of the past, change can make or break relationships.  One must know when he or she can't stomach change anymore.  You will know when you just can't go on in a relationship if any of the following has started or you believe will begin:

1.  Feeling the need to cover up stories with lies.  Sometimes having no feelings of remorse.
2.  Frequent thoughts of wishing ill on this person.
3.  Unable to forgive and forget every time he or she says or does something that offends.
4.  An increase of disputes followed by thoughts of breaking up that don't seem to go away.
5.  Your body often aches around this person from headaches to backaches.
6.  You don't enjoy touching, smelling, or looking at this person like you once did.
7.  You find that you have very little in common with him or her.

If most or even all of these signs apply to your current relationship, cut your losses early!  Make plans to distance yourself from this individual.  Cut this person off sexually and emotionally.  Get belongings and stay away from him or her.  If you force yourself to stay when you really don't want to, eventually you will mistreat this person and it just might lead to physical violence. 

Nicholl McGuire

When Dating Older Goes Bad...

Dr Phil: A 26 Year Age Divide: Can This Couple Be Saved [December 16, 2013]

Do You Know What You Really Want Young Woman, Older Gentleman?

The carefree attitude that a date might convey is such a draw when getting to know someone who looks and acts better than an ex.  In the beginning, everyone appears as if they are okay with just about anything one does.  "Do you have other people you are dating?"  Yes.  "Is it okay if we have sex?"  Sure.  "Do you like wild stuff?" Yeah.  "Would you mind if I asked you to...?"  Okay.  Everything seems so easy.  Right?  She compliments you on your physique and he talks about how much you are turning him on.  But then in time, things start to get complicated, doesn't it?

He wants you to do more of whatever you reluctantly agreed to.  She starts complaining about what you do or don't do.  What happened to the "No big deal" personality?  "How did we end up like this?" one asks his or herself.  The reason, there was never any boundaries.  The thought of protecting one's mind, body and spirit was too much for some and so they went along just to get along.

One must remember that when dating, you are still in a relationship with each and every person you are going out with, although short-lived at times, one is still relating to the other.  What this means is that eventually someone will be wanting something more if they sincerely like you.  Who wouldn't?  If I saw a piece of cake that I wanted, you think I wouldn't want a taste?  If you keep letting me eating of that cake, you are then training me to expect it. 

You have to know, whether you are returning to the dating scene, still in it, or planning to get out, what you truly want out of a partner or even better out of life?  If you are just blindly taking one day at a time, then you are leaving it up to someone else to dictate your future.  For instance, if a young woman knows that she wants to relocate in a week, a month, or a year from now and her older gentleman friend isn't planning on moving anywhere, guess who will want to try to change her plans?  Would he be willing to pack up his life for the sake of being with a younger partner?  Most likely not if he is content with his location.  A mature man knows that life outside of his sexual escapades is pretty much settled for him.

Now when one goes into a relationship with goals and visions of the future, he or she is seeking someone to help complete them.  Most people don't want to connect with individuals who can't help them in some way from friendship to business.  What is really the benefit in getting to know you?  What are you really receiving from the person you are dating besides the typical dinner, movie and sex at his or her house or a hotel some where?  What does the future really hold--more of the same?

Some people expect a lot when they date while others not so much.  When you have a good idea what you don't want when dating, you usually are able to determine what you do want.  Most individuals want a companion, a good friendship that just might last until death. 

Sometimes couples have a hard time in their relationships, because there is a failure to communicate what one really desires.  Men and women want to be heard in relationships and when there is more sexual groaning and moaning going on and less talking, in time one realizes he or she really doesn't know the person at all.  A date might want to get to know his sexual partner, but by that time it might be too late especially if the person has lost much interest.

So do take the time to share what you really want when dating a younger woman or older man, and who knows, it might grow into something more if you are willing.   

Nicholl McGuire author of Floral Beauty on a Dead End Street, a book of poems.

The 3 Steps To Dating Younger Women, Even If You Think They Are Way Out ...

Avoid Sex with Minors

Here are some reasons not to even think about dating a child much less being intimate with them!  There are laws in the United States against sex with minors.  Although some countries still permit these unions between children and adults, there are serious consequences that prove why one would be better off staying away!  Now some might argue that "Nothing happened when I..." but sooner or later something will, better off removing one's self out of the situation before someone gets hurt!

8-year-old bride dies from internal injuries because of 40-year-old husband

http://www.examiner.com/article/8-year-old-bride-dies-from-internal-injuries-because-of-40-year-old-husband

 

Malaysian Man Accused Of Rape Marries 13-Year-Old Victim; Attorney General Vows To Pursue Charges

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/22/malaysian-man-rape-marries-victim_n_3321086.html

 

Rumor Update: 70-year-old man marries 15-year-old girl

http://news.msn.com/rumors/rumor-update-70-year-old-man-marries-15-year-old-girl

 

 

5-year-old Indian girl dies of heart attack after rape (The incident was not an arranged marriage).

http://news.msn.com/world/5-year-old-indian-girl-dies-of-heart-attack-after-rape

 

Here are some tips when it comes to identifying whether a young woman is really a girl:

 

1.  She uses heavy makeup and when she appears without it, she looks like a young child.

 

2.  She doesn't converse like an experienced woman.  For instance, she has little, if any, responsibilites. 

 

3.  She often talks about parents or caretakers providing for her.

 

4.  Her ID appears to be tampered with and she acts like she can't be seen with you.

 

5.  The girl talks about interests that most young women aren't the least bit interested in.

 

6.  She is hypersexual (often talking about it, clingy, dresses for attention). 

 

7.  She may or may not act discreet when it comes to sex. She may show signs that she isn't respectful of herself or others. 

 

8.  When upset, she will cry like a child or have a fit.  She fails to communicate concerns like an adult would.

 

For more tips, see other articles on this blog under the labels "advice choosing young women to date" and "advice for older men seeking younger women."

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Whether she is looking for the wealthy professional long-term or he is seeking an attractive, young woman to be intimate with for the short term, the two must communicate their intentions or otherwise someone or both will have a rocky road to climb that just might leave the pair very weary and bitter with one another in the end.

People get involved in relationships for any number of reasons whether the church, parents, or government agrees or not.  Some couples connect for reasons that are obvious and have been publicly shared without shame while others not so much.  What is in darkness does come out into the light eventually, so one must be honest about his or her intent when dating a young woman or older man.

Take a moment to think about why a mature man seeks after a young lady in search of a Sugar Daddy or why a young, educated woman appears to act very interested in a rich, unattractive gentleman?  In these examples, these people have specific needs and believe their encounters with one another will meet them.  No matter the relationship, background, creed, religion, ethnicity, someone has learned of some benefit when one dates the other that he or she may or may not know about.  The rumor, stereotype, or "word on the street" might be true about one's love interest, but maybe not. 

It takes time to get to know people, but unfortunately far too many people are connecting on the Internet believing that they have found a special someone that will complete them only to be disappointed in the end.  Quality relationships aren't built through good communication alone!  You can express how you feel until you are blue in the face through email, text, and in-person discussion, but if a person isn't much interested in you, other than what you can do for him or her, you just won't be able to make them stay in a serious relationship that they may have never wanted in the first place.

To date one older can be a great experience with the right attitude and a mindset that can look beyond the aging process.  It is inevitable, people will get older.  When one chooses to date younger, he or she must recognize that there is still much a youthful partner doesn't know about life; therefore, much patience is required.  Personality differences will get in the way if one doesn't recognize that relationships are built on working together and not apart.  Sometimes one will have to set aside his or her preferences/interests/way of life for another.  One who is more concerned about "playing" is not interested in compromise.

Be sure you know what type of relationship you want with your younger or older mate.  There are open relationships, secretive ones, wild ones, committed ones, and more.  Be honest about who you are such as:  what you want, the past, present, and future if you want a relationship built on a solid foundation, but if you aren't seeking anything serious--save your best for the one who you really want in the future.  Establish boundaries when dating and avoid the temptation to do the kind of things that would bring shame on you and your family.  Most of all, be certain that dating young or older is what you sincerely want.

Nicholl McGuire author of Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate and When Mothers Cry.

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