Thursday

When a Relative Says " No Way" to Dating the Old Dude

Not everyone in the family will be supportive of a young woman dating an older fellow.  When this happens, it makes it difficult to focus on the relationship.  Male relatives can be overprotective and even threatening when it comes to their loved one going out with the "old dude" they may even wish death upon him for coming into their young relative's life.

Any man who sincerely wants to be in a relationship with someone will fight to be with his partner, but he won't be a fool to stay when all hell is breaking lose because of his mere existence.  One would be wise to determine what type of fight will he be fighting and how long in order to stay with his young date.  He will also need to observe his young partner's mannerisms whe dealing with family. She may still be too young mentally to handle being in a relationship with a mature man and too fearful to stand up to family.

Threats of violence from the woman's family members and friends just isn't worth it although some men enjoy a challenge.  However, one would be better off waiting until the young woman is independent and away from troubled relatives.  If she is in love and genuinely cares for her older man, she must understand that he is not going to keep putting his life at risk to be with her--no matter how beautiful she might be.  Chances are a relative or friend may have warned him to go away or else.

"The old dude" is typically hated by one or a few relatives simply because he may have done some things to the young woman that she shared with relatives who were supposed to keep quiet about, but didn't.  They don't like "the old dude" for good reason even if all parties don't know what about. 

Sometimes the older man did nothing during the dating process to hurt the young lady, but just the sight of an aging man going out with the young, attractive person just might be too much to bear for some.  Thoughts might be, "What does he want with my daughter/niece/sister/cousin?  Who does he think he is showing up at my doorstep...I know his type!?"  That type might be like the one questioning the relationship, a liar, cheat, pimp, player type.  It takes one, to know one.

The couple will want to consider the family's objections; however, don't permit loved ones to dominate one's choice in a partner.  Maybe there are some things that they see in one or both individuals that are a sincere cause for concern. 

Nicholl McGuire also maintains and contributes to the blog:  Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate. and Relationship Advice.

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