Showing posts with label independent young women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label independent young women. Show all posts
Wednesday
5 Younger Women Woes
So what exactly goes through a mind of a young woman with a bright future ahead of her? A lot! She wants it all! A life of happiness, joy, love, and money. But all too often, her dreams are dashed by a bad breakup, an unexpected pregnancy, student loan debt, and unresolved issues with parents. Oh yes, there is much to be expected when dating a young woman who is seemingly intelligent with a job and a couple of hobbies for her mental release.
Young women have their share of concerns like an older man, and their issues are not all heartfelt, deep, and mysterious.
1. She is concerned about her looks and sometimes worry about what she will look like when she gets older.
From makeup to clothes, even if she isn't drop-deap gorgeous and high maintenance, she is interested in self improvement. She wants nice things and she doesn't want to feel guilty or angry at her partner about buying them either. Most likely, she has been told, "You won't be young forever!"
2. She cares immensely for family and friends (that is if certain ones haven't been that bad.) When she wants to talk to and see her loved ones, she will go to great lengths to do just that even complaining on the way to her parent's home. But if they have treated her or others wrongly often, she has little, if any, time for them or her partner's people.
3. She desires a relationship and possibly children one day, but she doesn't want to be pressured into having or not having them by a certain age. If she is still very much concerned about her looks and personal needs, why would she want to make a conscientious sacrifice to have children because someone else wants them? One way an independent woman, who is energetic, people-loving, and career-driven will settle with a husband and have children in her twenties, is if she slips on the birth control. And if this happens, be prepared for a myriad of emotions (happy, sad, depressed, angry, insensitive, rude, impatient, etc.) Most young women don't want to settle down before they are ready. (See When Mothers Cry http://whenmotherscry.blogspot.com)
4. She hopes to have enough money to maintain a decent living, so she isn't happy until she finds that her career choice is paying off and she has some help that will make her life easier.
If a young woman has settled in the past with someone who was more of a burden than a blessing, she will most likely avoid being in a relationship with someone who wants her to abandon her career while he saves money toward his future.
5. She has no need for religion in good times, but when in bad, she looks for the nearest church, relative or friend to help her through challenging times.
Most young women are not diehard believers in any faith. They know of a Creator or choose not to believe in one; but rather look to themselves for answers. But when things go wrong, lots of things, these women will run to people, who they feel like they can trust, to help them make sense of challenging times. Some will become overzealous at first, but gradually die down when they first join a group. Others will move on to something else if they can't experience the peace they have hoped for. While others will become bitter if they have been mistreated in anyway by faith leaders and their members and may become easily offended and argumentative if one attempts to share his or her beliefs.
Of course, there are more younger women woes, but these are the common ones that tend to show up in various conversations, on tee-shirts in slogans or pictures, in magazines that she reads and movies that she watches, and wall hangings--Beauty, Friendship, Romance, Money, and Faith--if you can touch her soul and lifestyle, you just might have a friend for life!
Nicholl McGuire is the author of When Mothers Cry, a book for people interested in reading about the challenges of motherhood and how to solve some dilemmas when it comes to relationships, parenting, grandparents, in-laws, and more.
Young women have their share of concerns like an older man, and their issues are not all heartfelt, deep, and mysterious.
1. She is concerned about her looks and sometimes worry about what she will look like when she gets older.
From makeup to clothes, even if she isn't drop-deap gorgeous and high maintenance, she is interested in self improvement. She wants nice things and she doesn't want to feel guilty or angry at her partner about buying them either. Most likely, she has been told, "You won't be young forever!"
2. She cares immensely for family and friends (that is if certain ones haven't been that bad.) When she wants to talk to and see her loved ones, she will go to great lengths to do just that even complaining on the way to her parent's home. But if they have treated her or others wrongly often, she has little, if any, time for them or her partner's people.
3. She desires a relationship and possibly children one day, but she doesn't want to be pressured into having or not having them by a certain age. If she is still very much concerned about her looks and personal needs, why would she want to make a conscientious sacrifice to have children because someone else wants them? One way an independent woman, who is energetic, people-loving, and career-driven will settle with a husband and have children in her twenties, is if she slips on the birth control. And if this happens, be prepared for a myriad of emotions (happy, sad, depressed, angry, insensitive, rude, impatient, etc.) Most young women don't want to settle down before they are ready. (See When Mothers Cry http://whenmotherscry.blogspot.com)
4. She hopes to have enough money to maintain a decent living, so she isn't happy until she finds that her career choice is paying off and she has some help that will make her life easier.
If a young woman has settled in the past with someone who was more of a burden than a blessing, she will most likely avoid being in a relationship with someone who wants her to abandon her career while he saves money toward his future.
5. She has no need for religion in good times, but when in bad, she looks for the nearest church, relative or friend to help her through challenging times.
Most young women are not diehard believers in any faith. They know of a Creator or choose not to believe in one; but rather look to themselves for answers. But when things go wrong, lots of things, these women will run to people, who they feel like they can trust, to help them make sense of challenging times. Some will become overzealous at first, but gradually die down when they first join a group. Others will move on to something else if they can't experience the peace they have hoped for. While others will become bitter if they have been mistreated in anyway by faith leaders and their members and may become easily offended and argumentative if one attempts to share his or her beliefs.
Of course, there are more younger women woes, but these are the common ones that tend to show up in various conversations, on tee-shirts in slogans or pictures, in magazines that she reads and movies that she watches, and wall hangings--Beauty, Friendship, Romance, Money, and Faith--if you can touch her soul and lifestyle, you just might have a friend for life!
Nicholl McGuire is the author of When Mothers Cry, a book for people interested in reading about the challenges of motherhood and how to solve some dilemmas when it comes to relationships, parenting, grandparents, in-laws, and more.
Friday
Independent Woman: A Blessing & A Curse
Oh, how could it be that an independent woman could be both a blessing and a curse!? Well nowadays this is just what she is. You see, to an older man who grew up during a time when many women depended on a man to be both the breadwinner as well as drive the family from point a to point b, he is use to seeing men be the head in the family. So he may think that he should take care that his partner is never without money and/or his service. However, independent women of our present day actually frown on relationships like that. They wonder what is wrong with a woman who relies on a man to drive her around or requests money from a man. "She can do those things herself!" They cry. Sure, but if the partnership is working, who are we to judge?
When the independent woman contributes to the relationship her finances or other material things, she is considered a blessing to a man. However, when she expresses independent thoughts or ways that seem to overlook or overshadow her man, she is considered a curse. The older man enjoys the fruits of her labor, but doesn't want her to control anything, because he feels like a leadership role is his proper place in the home. Yet, independent women (especially those who have attended college) are very much like men, they are taught to not only service the people, but lead them too! Great mentality for the workplace, but not so great for intimate relationships! Too many leaders anywhere can create problems.
Independent women everywhere are doing well for themselves there is no question about it. There are both young and older men who take notice too! Some think, "Well, what can she do for me? I mean, I could use some help in my finances and in my quest to get ahead. I could use her to help me get where I want to be." This is where being independent can also be a curse. A successful woman is an easy target for men who aren't so successful; therefore she can easily be taken for granted.
Couples must get an understanding, before they start seriously dating exclusively on what kind of relationship they hope to have with one another. If the older man is the type who believes that a man should be king over his castle, then the two should talk about that. If the woman believes that she should be treated equal or even treated like the head in the relationship, then the older man should take note.
Both mentalities will lead to future problems if neither aren't willing to reach compromises.
There are many young independent thinking women who consider men to be icing on their cakes (so to speak) similar to how men have long thought of women. They don't see men as an important foundation in building up the relationship; rather these woman of today want to not only plan the cake, but also cook it and if a man comes along and wants to decorate it, that's okay, but it's not a requirement. An older man who doesn't have this understanding with his younger partner on what his role is in the relationship will have problems with a younger women! He should never assume that he knows younger women and how they think. Just like most clothes, one size doesn't fit all. She may remind you of someone and may even look like that person, but you must remind yourself that she is not!
Young women must also respect older men and their views about relationships--a man 10 plus years does have a different mindset than a man who is the same age as a young woman. As mentioned in this blog before, a considerably younger woman can't teach a considerably older man new tricks especially if he is too tired, too busy, too stressed or simply too old to do what she asks.
Far too many women, both young and old, desire to change men, and as we all know from watching other people go through bad relationships, it just doesn't work! Couples, the ones that last, know when to just wave the white flag and say, "I surrender!" An independent young woman who has her sights on her ambitions is not about to raise a white flag for anyone unless she sees some kind of benefit. The older man must ask himself, "What am I willing to put up with?"
Remember a young woman and an older man come from two different mindsets, possibly cultures, ethnicities, and the like. Neither should expect to dance by the beat of each other's drum without giving up something. The problem is an older man who is set in his ways isn't about to listen to someone younger and possibly inexperienced unless he sees some benefit. A younger woman most likely had problems listening to her father or some other older male relative growing up, so the last thing she wants is another father figure.
Both the younger woman and the older man will want to seriously evaluate the relationship and what exactly are the pros and cons to being with one another. He or she may want to seriously handle "the issues" (whatever they might be) as they arise without having to deal with the age factor unless need be.
In the heat of battle, no young woman wants to be called, "stupid, irresponsible or naïve" because she is younger and no older man wants to be called, "old, tired, forgetful or retarded" because he is older. But when someone who thinks with an independent mindset feels like he or she knows better and really doesn't feel like his or her partner is an asset to one's life, he or she will act disrespectful, arrogant or downright ignorant. Watch for these signs and more in your own relationship and be prepared to walk away when the time is right.
Nicholl McGuire
When the independent woman contributes to the relationship her finances or other material things, she is considered a blessing to a man. However, when she expresses independent thoughts or ways that seem to overlook or overshadow her man, she is considered a curse. The older man enjoys the fruits of her labor, but doesn't want her to control anything, because he feels like a leadership role is his proper place in the home. Yet, independent women (especially those who have attended college) are very much like men, they are taught to not only service the people, but lead them too! Great mentality for the workplace, but not so great for intimate relationships! Too many leaders anywhere can create problems.
Independent women everywhere are doing well for themselves there is no question about it. There are both young and older men who take notice too! Some think, "Well, what can she do for me? I mean, I could use some help in my finances and in my quest to get ahead. I could use her to help me get where I want to be." This is where being independent can also be a curse. A successful woman is an easy target for men who aren't so successful; therefore she can easily be taken for granted.
Couples must get an understanding, before they start seriously dating exclusively on what kind of relationship they hope to have with one another. If the older man is the type who believes that a man should be king over his castle, then the two should talk about that. If the woman believes that she should be treated equal or even treated like the head in the relationship, then the older man should take note.
Both mentalities will lead to future problems if neither aren't willing to reach compromises.
There are many young independent thinking women who consider men to be icing on their cakes (so to speak) similar to how men have long thought of women. They don't see men as an important foundation in building up the relationship; rather these woman of today want to not only plan the cake, but also cook it and if a man comes along and wants to decorate it, that's okay, but it's not a requirement. An older man who doesn't have this understanding with his younger partner on what his role is in the relationship will have problems with a younger women! He should never assume that he knows younger women and how they think. Just like most clothes, one size doesn't fit all. She may remind you of someone and may even look like that person, but you must remind yourself that she is not!
Young women must also respect older men and their views about relationships--a man 10 plus years does have a different mindset than a man who is the same age as a young woman. As mentioned in this blog before, a considerably younger woman can't teach a considerably older man new tricks especially if he is too tired, too busy, too stressed or simply too old to do what she asks.
Far too many women, both young and old, desire to change men, and as we all know from watching other people go through bad relationships, it just doesn't work! Couples, the ones that last, know when to just wave the white flag and say, "I surrender!" An independent young woman who has her sights on her ambitions is not about to raise a white flag for anyone unless she sees some kind of benefit. The older man must ask himself, "What am I willing to put up with?"
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| tipsdatingoldermen.BlogSpot.com |
Both the younger woman and the older man will want to seriously evaluate the relationship and what exactly are the pros and cons to being with one another. He or she may want to seriously handle "the issues" (whatever they might be) as they arise without having to deal with the age factor unless need be.
In the heat of battle, no young woman wants to be called, "stupid, irresponsible or naïve" because she is younger and no older man wants to be called, "old, tired, forgetful or retarded" because he is older. But when someone who thinks with an independent mindset feels like he or she knows better and really doesn't feel like his or her partner is an asset to one's life, he or she will act disrespectful, arrogant or downright ignorant. Watch for these signs and more in your own relationship and be prepared to walk away when the time is right.
Nicholl McGuire
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