She was 16 years old when she fell in love with a friend of the family who was 34 years old. The woman being interviewed didn't want her real name being shared, so her name will be April.
Back in the 1930s, the young April was a mere teen who had a life ahead of her, but she got distracted with the tall, dark and handsome fellow who admired her from a distance. She explains that he caught her eye, not only because he was so nice-looking, but also because "I wanted to leave my father's house...I was uneducated." She had attended elementary school on and off until about the age of 13 before her mother died. Her father, who had suddenly become a widow, went wild with the young ladies, according to April's relatives. So April and her siblings saw a poor example of how an older man treated young women. Relatives say he would drink, party, and have sex with them sometimes having a few at a time. They were children watching him abuse these women and some were women of the night.
But the handsome gentleman, who had been in April's family for years, had claimed that when she was a baby, the girl would one day become his wife. "I was still in my diapers my older relatives said when he told them that," said the 84 year old grandmother. April was impressed with the muscular man. "He could read and write." This was important to women of the time, because they knew that an educated man could get a better job than most and be able to provide for his family. April's older man was a blessing to a girl with a big heart. She grew up in a household of 20 and the older gentleman was going to get her out of there.
April warns young women, who share their trials with her, to be careful when it comes to dating men especially older ones. She says, "Don't trust a smiling face. There are dangerous men in this world." The mother of six learned the hard way. After leaving her father's house and going to be with the family friend, the mature gentleman would marry her and then move her out of state.
April was required to work during her marriage, because despite her husband's education, he had a strike against him--he was a black man trying to work during a time when racial dissension was present between blacks and whites. He also was one who liked to drink and party just like April's father. There was an obvious pattern, not only with April, but her siblings as well, most dated older men and many were cheated on. They basically got their father all over again through the men they dated and eventually married--his good, bad, rich and poor qualities all wrapped up in one!
April, being an uneducated black woman raising a family from the 1940s to the early 1960s, had her share of challenges as well; therefore, her options for employment were few. Housecleaning and cooking was what she did for very low wages. "I didn't have the opportunities back then, that young women have nowadays," April says. There was no daycare, Internet, an abundance of programs to help the needy, and many households didn't have televisions. April grew up poor, married into poverty, and then later acquired her personal wealth after her children became adults.
"This is why I tell young people to get an education, so that they don't have to settle for less," April advises. She tells women to put off marriage and having children until you have accomplished personal goals. There were times in her life she admits, she cried because of the poor decisions she made in life.
The man who had swept her off her feet and had given her so much happiness and promises, eventually caused her much upset to the point that she couldn't focus on anything she truly wanted to do. "He was abusive--a bastard! But my stupid self, loved him!" She pauses and then adds, "I asked myself, why do I love this man?" Long after her husband's passing, April admits that she still loves him. For years, April said that she attended church while choosing to remain in the abusive relationship for the sake of her children. She says that it was her faith in God that got her through many turbulent times.
But love doesn't verbally abuse or physically fight and two of April's own children wanted their father gone from the house, one even threatened to shoot his dad for beating up his mother. April was well aware that love doesn't hurt, but she was also fearful about leaving. There were times when she and her children did stay with relatives until her husband cooled down.
Nowadays, the 84 year old grandmother listens to young women's relationship plights and prays for them who labor to love their abusive mates while advising they get away. April blames her lack on why she settled. After decades of being cheated on, that handsome man who attracted many women both young and old met his fate. April shares that her abuser was burned to death in a house fire. "He moved out of our family home and got his own place in an apartment building where he lived for a time," April solemnly explains. "My husband called me the night before and asked if we could get back together. I told him I would have to pray about it. The next day I heard that he had died in a fire." April admits her faith was shook and cautions don't pray if you don't want an answer.
After the death of her husband back in the 70s, April says that "I could never love another man." When asked why, she said, "I was afraid that if I got close to one, I might kill him if he treated me the way my husband had." There were nice men that she courted (dated); however, she could recognize the signs that she couldn't be with them. Some of those red flags were:
1. Attempts to tell her how to parent her children while barely getting to know her.
2. Visiting only when convenient because an individual was married.
3. Lying about one's true intentions such as saying he wanted friendship when he really wanted sex.
4. Using threats and pressure to get her to commit.
5. Buying her gifts and bringing money to secure a place in her life even when she was no longer romantically interested in her gentleman suitor.
April shares that when a man makes you feel like less than a woman such as often acting rudely, jealous, or bitter, stop dating him. When you feel like you have to report your every move to him, don't. If the older man doesn't appreciate what you are doing for him, stop giving him sex, visiting him, or whatever else you are doing. April adds, "Don't be a fool!"
Nicholl McGuire is the author of the following books:
Know Your Enemy: The Christian's Critic https://www.createspace.com/3437273
When Mothers Cry https://www.createspace.com/3393499
Laboring to Love Myself https://www.createspace.com/3401526
Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate https://www.createspace.com/3332346
Floral Beauty on a Dead End Street http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/904839
Spiritual Poems By Nicholl http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/3113926
An age gap dating advice blog that provides valuable tips when dating older men and younger women. Thought-provoking relationship tips for older men seeking to date younger women. Please be advised to seek a professional for serious issues. Contributors are not all licensed or trained in relationship counseling. This blog is not for people under the age of 18.
Saturday
Tuesday
How to Keep a Young Woman Interested in You and Not Your Flaws
When one is mature seeking a youthful lady, he has to know that in order to keep her interest, he must have some things about him that keep her coming back for more other than the typical large financial portfolio, sex, and impressive toys that other rich gentleman suitors have. A wise younger woman is going to look the other way after a few dates when she starts to see those flaws that tend to show up out of nowhere with some older men. For instance, he typically dyes his hair, but after a few dates he advertises his grays for the world to see. He might even trade a nice dress shirt for a boring, old tee-shirt.
What does the premature display of the real you say to this young woman who may still consider you a stranger? “He’s a great actor. I didn’t realize just how old he really is until he showed up with that 1970’s wardrobe with his white hair sprouting everywhere!” A young woman can have a short attention span especially for an older man who stands before her looking dull and tired. Face it, some men have to work harder than others to keep a woman happy.
1. Communicate your strengths.
You might not be active like most men, but you are smarter than many of them. Put your intelligence to work and help that young woman improve herself physically, mentally and spiritually when the opportune time comes. She just might say, “I was thinking, maybe you could help me with…” Jump at the opportunity by sharing what you know about her concerns and how might she be able to solve them.
2. Focus on your accomplishments and how they have helped others.
What is it about you that impresses most men and women that know you? You might be lacking in looks, but you might have a long list of awards for your generosity, gifts for helping others, business achievements, and more. Share what drives you to be the best you can be. She just might overlook those imperfections that others would run from.
3. Ask her about her goals, dreams and desires.
Young women like to talk about themselves, so encourage her to do so. This might make you stand out from those other guys because she you are sincerely interested in hearing what she has to say. Once again, look for opportunities to help her achieve her dreams.
4. Take care of yourself.
Men who do things to improve their appearances are a draw for many women. A man who doesn’t smoke, maintains his body weight, and smells good has a better chance at meeting and keeping a woman than a man who does the total opposite.
5. Point out obvious issues before she does, and mention what you are doing to try to fix them.
Women have flaws just like men, but when they are noticeable, many will explain the who, what, when, where, why, and how of them all. When men share their war stories, they just might get a sympathetic ear and someone who will get a little closer to them depending on the story. So if you know you can’t hide your issue like a large scar across your left cheek, talk about it, but don’t say so much that it makes her scared, worried, or concerned for her life.
6. Share a few past failures, but mention how you managed to move on with your life.
It is better that she hears about your past then from the neighborhood, so if you did some things that she just might find out about if she were to conduct a background check, let her know. However, include what you are doing differently now and how you resolved past issues.
7. Mention the people and things you do that keep you motivated.
Are there some people who could vouch for how good of a man you truly are? In time, you will want to use them to help your date reach a decision on whether you are good for her or not. Some single women might not be completely convinced about dating certain men due to one flaw or another, but then along comes the single man’s mom and sister bragging about their loved one and now a date, who was once in doubt, is ready to commit.
When a young woman notices your flaws, don’t hide, worry, or think the worse, just do your best to explain, but not so much that she desires to go elsewhere. Know what impresses your date and stick to those things that keep her interested in you and not your flaws.
Nicholl McGuire is the author of the following books:
Know Your Enemy: The Christian's Critic https://www.createspace.com/3437273
When Mothers Cry https://www.createspace.com/3393499
Laboring to Love Myself https://www.createspace.com/3401526
Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate https://www.createspace.com/3332346
Floral Beauty on a Dead End Street http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/904839
Spiritual Poems By Nicholl http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/3113926
What does the premature display of the real you say to this young woman who may still consider you a stranger? “He’s a great actor. I didn’t realize just how old he really is until he showed up with that 1970’s wardrobe with his white hair sprouting everywhere!” A young woman can have a short attention span especially for an older man who stands before her looking dull and tired. Face it, some men have to work harder than others to keep a woman happy.
1. Communicate your strengths.
You might not be active like most men, but you are smarter than many of them. Put your intelligence to work and help that young woman improve herself physically, mentally and spiritually when the opportune time comes. She just might say, “I was thinking, maybe you could help me with…” Jump at the opportunity by sharing what you know about her concerns and how might she be able to solve them.
2. Focus on your accomplishments and how they have helped others.
What is it about you that impresses most men and women that know you? You might be lacking in looks, but you might have a long list of awards for your generosity, gifts for helping others, business achievements, and more. Share what drives you to be the best you can be. She just might overlook those imperfections that others would run from.
3. Ask her about her goals, dreams and desires.
Young women like to talk about themselves, so encourage her to do so. This might make you stand out from those other guys because she you are sincerely interested in hearing what she has to say. Once again, look for opportunities to help her achieve her dreams.
4. Take care of yourself.
Men who do things to improve their appearances are a draw for many women. A man who doesn’t smoke, maintains his body weight, and smells good has a better chance at meeting and keeping a woman than a man who does the total opposite.
5. Point out obvious issues before she does, and mention what you are doing to try to fix them.
Women have flaws just like men, but when they are noticeable, many will explain the who, what, when, where, why, and how of them all. When men share their war stories, they just might get a sympathetic ear and someone who will get a little closer to them depending on the story. So if you know you can’t hide your issue like a large scar across your left cheek, talk about it, but don’t say so much that it makes her scared, worried, or concerned for her life.
6. Share a few past failures, but mention how you managed to move on with your life.
It is better that she hears about your past then from the neighborhood, so if you did some things that she just might find out about if she were to conduct a background check, let her know. However, include what you are doing differently now and how you resolved past issues.
7. Mention the people and things you do that keep you motivated.
Are there some people who could vouch for how good of a man you truly are? In time, you will want to use them to help your date reach a decision on whether you are good for her or not. Some single women might not be completely convinced about dating certain men due to one flaw or another, but then along comes the single man’s mom and sister bragging about their loved one and now a date, who was once in doubt, is ready to commit.
When a young woman notices your flaws, don’t hide, worry, or think the worse, just do your best to explain, but not so much that she desires to go elsewhere. Know what impresses your date and stick to those things that keep her interested in you and not your flaws.
Nicholl McGuire is the author of the following books:
Know Your Enemy: The Christian's Critic https://www.createspace.com/3437273
When Mothers Cry https://www.createspace.com/3393499
Laboring to Love Myself https://www.createspace.com/3401526
Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate https://www.createspace.com/3332346
Floral Beauty on a Dead End Street http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/904839
Spiritual Poems By Nicholl http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/3113926
Saturday
Friday
When All the Older Gentleman Wants is a Companion
With so many articles and videos talking about older men wanting nothing more than sex from young women, it can be a challenge to think any differently. But there are rich, as well as poor men, who aren’t interested in sex as much as they use to, simply put, they are all sexed out (at least temporarily that is). What might a young woman offer a gentleman besides sex?
Communication
A young woman and an older man who are on the go often, meeting people, volunteering, working, and just living a full life will have a bunch of stories to tell. They will enjoy long talks at places they like to frequent. They will share knowledge of some sites they might want to visit one day together. There is a lot to do and a woman who likes to communicate and travel is a great catch for an older man who still very much has a lot of life in him!
Friendship
When one has lived a life of strife, it is hard to come by good friends. Sometimes the only friend that one has is his or herself. Quality friendship is something that most people desire. No matter how many riches a man has, he will most likely want the company of a woman who can keep a secret, respect him, provide assistance in times of need, and hopefully love him for who he is and not just what he can give her. A young lady who truly knows what it means to be a good friend will be one of the lucky ones to land a nice, generous, older man one day!
Physical Touch without the Sex
Believe it or not, back when you were in high school, you didn’t have sex with everyone you met, you actually had friendships where the only thing you did was hold hands and hug. There are still many people in this world who love one another but have a lack of interest in sex due to a number of mental and body health issues. So hand-holding is good, a hug better, and a soft kiss is the best for some May-December relationships.
Consider looking beyond what many expect will occur between an older man and a younger woman dating; instead, find ways to build on the romance, appreciate one another, learn, and grow in this ever-changing world together!
Nicholl McGuire
Communication
A young woman and an older man who are on the go often, meeting people, volunteering, working, and just living a full life will have a bunch of stories to tell. They will enjoy long talks at places they like to frequent. They will share knowledge of some sites they might want to visit one day together. There is a lot to do and a woman who likes to communicate and travel is a great catch for an older man who still very much has a lot of life in him!
Friendship
When one has lived a life of strife, it is hard to come by good friends. Sometimes the only friend that one has is his or herself. Quality friendship is something that most people desire. No matter how many riches a man has, he will most likely want the company of a woman who can keep a secret, respect him, provide assistance in times of need, and hopefully love him for who he is and not just what he can give her. A young lady who truly knows what it means to be a good friend will be one of the lucky ones to land a nice, generous, older man one day!
Physical Touch without the Sex
Believe it or not, back when you were in high school, you didn’t have sex with everyone you met, you actually had friendships where the only thing you did was hold hands and hug. There are still many people in this world who love one another but have a lack of interest in sex due to a number of mental and body health issues. So hand-holding is good, a hug better, and a soft kiss is the best for some May-December relationships.
Consider looking beyond what many expect will occur between an older man and a younger woman dating; instead, find ways to build on the romance, appreciate one another, learn, and grow in this ever-changing world together!
Nicholl McGuire
Thursday
Why Some Young Classy Women Won't Date Older Men Again
For some young women, they have already experienced dating older men and prefer not to do it again for a number of reasons. Some of which are obvious and others not so much.
An older man who is pushy about getting a young, classy woman to date him isn't always going to win in the end, if anything, he just might prove a negative viewpoint or two that a bitter young woman has about him. So when an older man sees the writing on the wall, "She's not interested," keep it moving!
1. She no longer finds dating older men interesting.
Maybe it was at one time fun for her, but as she grows older she realizes that dating a man simply for curiousity sake and what he can do for her is simply not right or good enough. She desires more for herself.
2. She is not attracted to the way men double, even triple her age, looks.
At one point, she could look past the gray hairs, age marks, and wrinkles, but now she prefers to look at someone with less flaws.
3. She is doing quite well in life without an older man.
When she was struggling, she didn't mind having an older man or two around, but now that she is doing well, she is fine without them.
4. She finally started listening to family and friends about not dating mature men.
Her loved ones told her that she shouldn't be dating older men and what if she wants a family one day. They convinced her that she was "classy, better, smarter, more active than her old boyfriends, have years of growth and opportunity while they will settle down and one day die..."and whatever else they said to her to cause her to lose interest in older men.
5. She has been burned far too many times to keep taking chances dating older men.
From young guys to old ones, she has just grown weary of drama and would prefer to stop dating awhile. But when she returns to the scene, she rather take her chances with someone her own age with less issues.
6. She feels like they want to dominate her--keep her in the house.
After having been watched and guarded like an animal, a young woman wants to be free of some older men's strict ways and control. Despite not all mature men being this way, she doesn't want to risk her freedom being with the insecure, jealous type yet again.
7. She finds most mature men boring, not on her level spiritually, physically and or mentally.
A man with a lot of unresolved issues will negatively impact a young woman who is positive and happy about life. Some young women just lose interest in men (young or old) that retard their growth in becoming a strong, independent woman that they want to be.
Mature men, when you specifically know why a younger woman might not be interested in you any longer, you use what you know, and work hard to be more attractive to other young women who just might be willing to date you. Don't pursue young women who have made it plain, "I don't like you." Even if you are a success at winning her to you, it doesn't mean that she will remain with you for all the right reasons. You just might be a temporary fix for her until someone better comes along.
Step back from your conquests for a time and ask yourself the following: Do you find that you are overbearing, suffocating, or seek to dominate young women? What have they said about you in anger? Have you taken care of your past business with other partners or are you still somehow connected to them? Are you the type who likes to play mind games with young women rather than take them seriously? Is there something about the way you look, talk, or dress that turns women off?
Until an older man can honestly look at his flaws, he will not find a young partner suitable for him that would be willing to stay in his life while being that sweetheart he so desires.
Take care of your issues--whatever they might be before thinking about dating a classy young lady.
Nicholl McGuire
An older man who is pushy about getting a young, classy woman to date him isn't always going to win in the end, if anything, he just might prove a negative viewpoint or two that a bitter young woman has about him. So when an older man sees the writing on the wall, "She's not interested," keep it moving!
1. She no longer finds dating older men interesting.
Maybe it was at one time fun for her, but as she grows older she realizes that dating a man simply for curiousity sake and what he can do for her is simply not right or good enough. She desires more for herself.
2. She is not attracted to the way men double, even triple her age, looks.
At one point, she could look past the gray hairs, age marks, and wrinkles, but now she prefers to look at someone with less flaws.
3. She is doing quite well in life without an older man.
When she was struggling, she didn't mind having an older man or two around, but now that she is doing well, she is fine without them.
4. She finally started listening to family and friends about not dating mature men.
Her loved ones told her that she shouldn't be dating older men and what if she wants a family one day. They convinced her that she was "classy, better, smarter, more active than her old boyfriends, have years of growth and opportunity while they will settle down and one day die..."and whatever else they said to her to cause her to lose interest in older men.
5. She has been burned far too many times to keep taking chances dating older men.
From young guys to old ones, she has just grown weary of drama and would prefer to stop dating awhile. But when she returns to the scene, she rather take her chances with someone her own age with less issues.
6. She feels like they want to dominate her--keep her in the house.
After having been watched and guarded like an animal, a young woman wants to be free of some older men's strict ways and control. Despite not all mature men being this way, she doesn't want to risk her freedom being with the insecure, jealous type yet again.
7. She finds most mature men boring, not on her level spiritually, physically and or mentally.
A man with a lot of unresolved issues will negatively impact a young woman who is positive and happy about life. Some young women just lose interest in men (young or old) that retard their growth in becoming a strong, independent woman that they want to be.
Mature men, when you specifically know why a younger woman might not be interested in you any longer, you use what you know, and work hard to be more attractive to other young women who just might be willing to date you. Don't pursue young women who have made it plain, "I don't like you." Even if you are a success at winning her to you, it doesn't mean that she will remain with you for all the right reasons. You just might be a temporary fix for her until someone better comes along.
Step back from your conquests for a time and ask yourself the following: Do you find that you are overbearing, suffocating, or seek to dominate young women? What have they said about you in anger? Have you taken care of your past business with other partners or are you still somehow connected to them? Are you the type who likes to play mind games with young women rather than take them seriously? Is there something about the way you look, talk, or dress that turns women off?
Until an older man can honestly look at his flaws, he will not find a young partner suitable for him that would be willing to stay in his life while being that sweetheart he so desires.
Take care of your issues--whatever they might be before thinking about dating a classy young lady.
Nicholl McGuire
Wednesday
Lies of the Broke, Busted and Disgusted: The So-Called Rich Older Man
A gorgeous young woman and an older, (not-so attractive) possibly rich, man strike up a conversation.
The young woman tosses back her hair and finds the older man funny, unique, she likes what she hears. As for the older man, he likes what he sees. For weeks, the two exchange laughs and eventually numbers. As their friendship grows, the older man shares details about his successes in life and future plans to relocate, buy a bigger house, and share his wealth with someone special. Music to the potential sweetheart's ears whose eyes seek gold. The gullible woman, who doesn't have much experience dating men young or old, believes almost everything the so-called well-to-do businessman says--that is until she notices the older man's present life isn't necessarily reflecting all the riches and glories he talks about.
The supposedly rich man's wallet is often empty. His clothes a bit worn and his shoes don't shine. He rarely goes anywhere, but home after work and even his work hours aren't always consistent. Car trouble is frequent and sometimes the rich man's cell phone number is off, yet the young woman doesn't think too much about it. She shakes off those little details, because "they don't mean anything, there are plenty of men that don't dress up and don't carry cash--no big deal," she convinces herself. But stories aren't adding up and witnesses don't believe the hype, yet she continues to have faith in her rich, old friend.
This observant young woman's concerns begin to increase. Puzzled by her braggart rich guy, the recent college graduate starts to question his lifestyle. Feeling like he might lose his friendship with the nice young lady who is so very helpful to him, the old man has to embellish a few stories, so he starts talking about "When I get my money from an investment I made some years back, I will do for you...When I receive my settlement check from...I will help you....If everything goes well with this upcoming deal, I will share some money with you..." So the starry-eyed young female perks up and waits and waits and waits for the manipulative older man to make good on his promises. But nothing happens.
Some of you men and women reading this may have experienced something like the previous story or you heard about someone in a situation like this. It is sad to say the least. A lonely, desperate man who doesn't want a lovely lady to slip through his hands will say just about anything to keep her near. Meanwhile, the vibrant young woman will put off the fact that she isn't the least bit attracted to the poor man posing as a rich man, but his promises of a financially secure future sound good to her ears. When she begins to experience jilted feelings, especially after giving her sexy body to a man who should have never laid eyes on it, she starts looking visibly irritated with him whenever he comes around, and she just might argue with him about almost anything. The frustration of "...not having," "...putting up with," and "What more can I take from this man?" types of emotions begin to drive the bitter woman crazy. She yells out one day, "I thought you said you would help me with..." The once charming man worried that he might have to defend himself from his girlfriend's flailing arms, yells back, "I told you I would help you, now stop talking about it! And besides you need to be patient, because I really don't have to give you anything!" Uh oh, this old man better run for the door! Weeks and weeks of hoping, wishing, and waiting on something based on promises from an older person, the young woman becomes increasingly disrespectful. She begins to think, "How might I get rid of this nusiance that is doing nothing more than bringing me down? I have a life to live! I am still young, I don't need this old loser!"
Unlike the young woman in that story, a discerning youthful woman won't fall for such traps set by sneaky, lustful, old, poor men. Rather than entertain them, she tells herself, "They are too old for me. I don't want anything to do with old men." She most likely has been schooled by old players on the games that some of these foolish men play to get between her legs. Side note: If you are a father, are you teaching your daughter on the pros and cons of dating older men?
Both rich and poor men lie. But a poor man who plans to capitalize off a young woman who can barely keep a savings account is pathetic! And a young woman who holds on to a broke, unattractive old man she could care less about in the hopes that he will bless her bank account is equally pathetic! There is no love between these two no matter what they say and who knows them, both are using one another until one day one or both of them wake up to the truth.
"So you were never getting any money, were you, old man?"
"No, I'm sorry."
"I knew you were lying to me! Why do I always fall for your type?"
"Oh, stop it! You never loved me anyway, little girl."
Nope, she never did. Rather, she was in love with his promise and he was in lust with her beauty.
Nicholl McGuire
The young woman tosses back her hair and finds the older man funny, unique, she likes what she hears. As for the older man, he likes what he sees. For weeks, the two exchange laughs and eventually numbers. As their friendship grows, the older man shares details about his successes in life and future plans to relocate, buy a bigger house, and share his wealth with someone special. Music to the potential sweetheart's ears whose eyes seek gold. The gullible woman, who doesn't have much experience dating men young or old, believes almost everything the so-called well-to-do businessman says--that is until she notices the older man's present life isn't necessarily reflecting all the riches and glories he talks about.
The supposedly rich man's wallet is often empty. His clothes a bit worn and his shoes don't shine. He rarely goes anywhere, but home after work and even his work hours aren't always consistent. Car trouble is frequent and sometimes the rich man's cell phone number is off, yet the young woman doesn't think too much about it. She shakes off those little details, because "they don't mean anything, there are plenty of men that don't dress up and don't carry cash--no big deal," she convinces herself. But stories aren't adding up and witnesses don't believe the hype, yet she continues to have faith in her rich, old friend.
This observant young woman's concerns begin to increase. Puzzled by her braggart rich guy, the recent college graduate starts to question his lifestyle. Feeling like he might lose his friendship with the nice young lady who is so very helpful to him, the old man has to embellish a few stories, so he starts talking about "When I get my money from an investment I made some years back, I will do for you...When I receive my settlement check from...I will help you....If everything goes well with this upcoming deal, I will share some money with you..." So the starry-eyed young female perks up and waits and waits and waits for the manipulative older man to make good on his promises. But nothing happens.
Some of you men and women reading this may have experienced something like the previous story or you heard about someone in a situation like this. It is sad to say the least. A lonely, desperate man who doesn't want a lovely lady to slip through his hands will say just about anything to keep her near. Meanwhile, the vibrant young woman will put off the fact that she isn't the least bit attracted to the poor man posing as a rich man, but his promises of a financially secure future sound good to her ears. When she begins to experience jilted feelings, especially after giving her sexy body to a man who should have never laid eyes on it, she starts looking visibly irritated with him whenever he comes around, and she just might argue with him about almost anything. The frustration of "...not having," "...putting up with," and "What more can I take from this man?" types of emotions begin to drive the bitter woman crazy. She yells out one day, "I thought you said you would help me with..." The once charming man worried that he might have to defend himself from his girlfriend's flailing arms, yells back, "I told you I would help you, now stop talking about it! And besides you need to be patient, because I really don't have to give you anything!" Uh oh, this old man better run for the door! Weeks and weeks of hoping, wishing, and waiting on something based on promises from an older person, the young woman becomes increasingly disrespectful. She begins to think, "How might I get rid of this nusiance that is doing nothing more than bringing me down? I have a life to live! I am still young, I don't need this old loser!"
Unlike the young woman in that story, a discerning youthful woman won't fall for such traps set by sneaky, lustful, old, poor men. Rather than entertain them, she tells herself, "They are too old for me. I don't want anything to do with old men." She most likely has been schooled by old players on the games that some of these foolish men play to get between her legs. Side note: If you are a father, are you teaching your daughter on the pros and cons of dating older men?
Both rich and poor men lie. But a poor man who plans to capitalize off a young woman who can barely keep a savings account is pathetic! And a young woman who holds on to a broke, unattractive old man she could care less about in the hopes that he will bless her bank account is equally pathetic! There is no love between these two no matter what they say and who knows them, both are using one another until one day one or both of them wake up to the truth.
"So you were never getting any money, were you, old man?"
"No, I'm sorry."
"I knew you were lying to me! Why do I always fall for your type?"
"Oh, stop it! You never loved me anyway, little girl."
Nope, she never did. Rather, she was in love with his promise and he was in lust with her beauty.
Nicholl McGuire
Tuesday
Humor: How To Land An Older Man
A funny video that for some women and men is all too true! Save the act young ladies and just be yourself!
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