When you date older expect your date to have what you might consider some out-dated principles. There are still some men in this world who believe that a woman's place is at home with children while the man works. Men who have a faith in God may expect no sex until marriage. You will find that some older men do have a way of doing things that isn't modern, youthful or even comprehensible to one who is still learning and growing.
Certain family members won't accept you.
As much as we all would like to be accepted by our partner's relatives, it just won't happen. There will be those in his family that will not go along just to get along especially if they are Christian or have some other belief system. Your partner may not see anything wrong with cohabitation, but his mother, sister, brother or someone else will. He may find that having a child out of wedlock isn't a big deal like it once was, but his family or maybe even yours are giving you a firestorm of criticism. Sometimes it is your special someone who is the one who is against all things deemed immoral while you are more laid back. Whatever the issue, you will have to respect his faith, uphold your personal views, as well as consider the opinions of those around you. It also doesn't hurt to consider what people are saying and why they may be reacting negatively about you and your companion being together. Sometimes relatives simply don't care what you do, but if you have a faith, ask yourself, "What does my Creator think?"
Friends won't find you have much in common with them.
When there is a significant age difference, you will find it challenging to make friends with his friends. Some women disdain younger women being with older men, because unfortunately they have had their share of cheating partners and disrespectful young women in their presence. As much as you would like for friends to accept you and act interested in what you have to say, think about this, "Would you really be interested in associating with people 15 or 20 years younger than you?"
Your mature partner may treat you differently than younger dates.
A relationship that may have started off good, may end up being a terrible choice, because you or your mature lover may have allowed far too many voices to influence the way you see one another. He may start acting distant as if trying to erase his mistake with picking you. On the other hand, you may stop calling or coming around him, because you know that he too was a bad choice. When a couple comes to the realization that they may have bit off more than they can chew (when it comes to building a relationship that lasts,) it is best to get out as soon as you can or seriously consider making changes in the relationship that will help it evolve into a marital commitment. Otherwise, you wait too long and you will find yourself making more and more mistakes that will be harder and harder to fix. Even worse, some things we do to others, can never be undone and unfortunately we reap the consequences later despite having prayed about them and sought wise counsel.
Be certain that when you date old school, you know the rules of the old school.
Nicholl McGuire
A age gap dating advice blog that provides valuable tips when dating older men and younger women. Thought-provoking relationship tips for older men seeking to date younger women. Please be advised to seek a professional for serious issues. Contributors are not all licensed or trained in relationship counseling. This blog is not for people under the age of 18.
Wednesday
Tuesday
Faith & Relationship: Does it Really Matter?
Anyone who has ever been introduced to the God of the Holy Bible or some other faith knows that you have made a life decision to walk a spiritual path. There is no way that you can date someone, grow closer then think that your faith will have zero impact on your relationship.
If you are one who is still married, but separated, you know that dating someone whether younger, older or in between wouldn't be wise. At some point in the relationship, your mate is going to want something long lasting with you. What are you going to tell this person? "Sure, I want that too, but I'm still married..." That response will set your intimate relationship so far back that it might not even work out. What bible-believing young woman or older man is going to stay in love with a person who is still trying to sort out whether or not he or she wants to let go of his or her past, much less want to be married in the future?
It also isn't wise to date any one just because you are lonely. Spiritual believers who seek relationships are looking for more than just companionship. Eventually, someone who is really interested in a commitment is going to want to merge names, households, and bodies together in the name of whatever God or gods he or she believes in.
When one is interested in dating one or many people, he or she must realize that someone out there is going to take his or her faith seriously and this person will expect you to live up to your beliefs. In other words, if you claim to be a believer, you will walk the walk.
Of course, there are those daters who are adulterers, fornicators, backsliders and more who claim they, "Love the Lord...attend church, pray, fast, and read the Bible" but the truth is that God is so removed from their lives because they are living in sin. These people have double-minds, unstable and desire to appease their flesh, more than their spirits. Their faith just isn't as important as one might think. In time, truth is revealed and that young woman or older man who had once been hoodwinked will slowly or rapidly realize that this person is no fit in his or her life. In a situation like this, age has nothing to do with it, but deceit, backward talk regarding one's faith, and other spiritual revelation has separated the couple.
When a man has reached maturity, he will not pretend to be something he is not. If he isn't walking with Jesus or some other spiritual being, he will just speak truth. When a mature, young woman is not interested in a faith, she will just say so. But immature, immoral and ignorant people will play mind games. They will act in ways that will tell an observer, "Now this one is nothing more than a hypocrite!" If the person dating the backslider or unbeliever doesn't see it, the person's family will see the deceitful person a mile away and warn their beloved relative to "leave him alone...he is not right for you...she is an immoral woman...she is immature, silly."
Sometimes it is best just to listen to those people who are dedicated to their faith and wise. They can help you weed out the good from the bad during your dating phase. Hopefully, in time, you will meet someone who shares the same faith as you do! It is a beautiful thing to be with someone who loves your God like you do!
Nicholl McGuire
More inspirational writings at: http://spiritualpoemsbynicholl.blogspot.com
If you are one who is still married, but separated, you know that dating someone whether younger, older or in between wouldn't be wise. At some point in the relationship, your mate is going to want something long lasting with you. What are you going to tell this person? "Sure, I want that too, but I'm still married..." That response will set your intimate relationship so far back that it might not even work out. What bible-believing young woman or older man is going to stay in love with a person who is still trying to sort out whether or not he or she wants to let go of his or her past, much less want to be married in the future?
It also isn't wise to date any one just because you are lonely. Spiritual believers who seek relationships are looking for more than just companionship. Eventually, someone who is really interested in a commitment is going to want to merge names, households, and bodies together in the name of whatever God or gods he or she believes in.
When one is interested in dating one or many people, he or she must realize that someone out there is going to take his or her faith seriously and this person will expect you to live up to your beliefs. In other words, if you claim to be a believer, you will walk the walk.
Of course, there are those daters who are adulterers, fornicators, backsliders and more who claim they, "Love the Lord...attend church, pray, fast, and read the Bible" but the truth is that God is so removed from their lives because they are living in sin. These people have double-minds, unstable and desire to appease their flesh, more than their spirits. Their faith just isn't as important as one might think. In time, truth is revealed and that young woman or older man who had once been hoodwinked will slowly or rapidly realize that this person is no fit in his or her life. In a situation like this, age has nothing to do with it, but deceit, backward talk regarding one's faith, and other spiritual revelation has separated the couple.
When a man has reached maturity, he will not pretend to be something he is not. If he isn't walking with Jesus or some other spiritual being, he will just speak truth. When a mature, young woman is not interested in a faith, she will just say so. But immature, immoral and ignorant people will play mind games. They will act in ways that will tell an observer, "Now this one is nothing more than a hypocrite!" If the person dating the backslider or unbeliever doesn't see it, the person's family will see the deceitful person a mile away and warn their beloved relative to "leave him alone...he is not right for you...she is an immoral woman...she is immature, silly."
Sometimes it is best just to listen to those people who are dedicated to their faith and wise. They can help you weed out the good from the bad during your dating phase. Hopefully, in time, you will meet someone who shares the same faith as you do! It is a beautiful thing to be with someone who loves your God like you do!
Nicholl McGuire
More inspirational writings at: http://spiritualpoemsbynicholl.blogspot.com
Thursday
Teacher Leaves Wife, Kids for High School Student | Parenting - Yahoo! Shine
If you ever needed an example of what mid-life looks like when someone isn't taking his vitamin supplements, herbal remedies, and a prescription med for his hormones, look no further! She desperately needs a father figure and he definitely wants someone in his life to make him feel like he is 18 once again! When you read the article, you will notice how he talks about his attraction to her like it was an overnight thing that began when she turned 18--not hardly. I will be the first to support any relationship that is healthy and balanced, but this one, it stinks of hormones and dysfunction!
Teacher Leaves Wife, Kids for High School Student | Parenting - Yahoo! Shine
Teacher Leaves Wife, Kids for High School Student | Parenting - Yahoo! Shine
Monday
Your Issues, His Issues and Now Our Issues
So you thought you could be everything to him or her. You bought this person nice things. You made time to go with him or her here and there. You really thought you met your match, that is until you started looking more closely at this person you slept with the other night. "She is a bit off," you think. "He seems to be a bit slow," she thinks. Whatever you noticed about this person, it has put a damper on your relationship. Now you hope that this person will do something that will make you fall back in lust (or love) with him or her-- good luck.
Once truth reveals itself in people, it becomes hard to get the fantasy back. You want that person to be that special someone you met over and over again. Immature people think in this way. People desperate for someone to come rescue them from their past also think like this. Before you know it, you got someone yelling, "Why can't I find the right someone!" Could it be, that you want your dates to fulfill a dream rather than a reality?
You have your issues when you came into the relationship that most likely you wanted your date to overlook. Then there was the issues. Your date had some and you had your share. Then there were those issues you had together. With all of these "issues" also known as relationship challenges, it isn't any wonder that this romance started quickly and then ended just as quickly.
If there is no room in the relationship to just grow freely of the complications of an ex, the baby, the money, the relatives, the friends, an abusive childhood, etc. then yes a beautiful fantasy dies and it may never come back. You should never think a person is going to be your cure all!
For many people, they know, starting this year, it is time to bury the fantasy and welcome reality. They must want to do the things that are right for self and the relationship. But where to start? A change of mindset, a reality check! Look at the things in the relationship that is causing it to become unbalanced, miserable, and something you no longer want. If you allow a relationship to grow in a setting free of outside influence, criticism and unresolved issues of the past, how beautiful it can be! Keep in mind, it takes work, lots of it. But if you are in love, and not in lust, it will go the distance.
Nicholl McGuire
Once truth reveals itself in people, it becomes hard to get the fantasy back. You want that person to be that special someone you met over and over again. Immature people think in this way. People desperate for someone to come rescue them from their past also think like this. Before you know it, you got someone yelling, "Why can't I find the right someone!" Could it be, that you want your dates to fulfill a dream rather than a reality?
You have your issues when you came into the relationship that most likely you wanted your date to overlook. Then there was the issues. Your date had some and you had your share. Then there were those issues you had together. With all of these "issues" also known as relationship challenges, it isn't any wonder that this romance started quickly and then ended just as quickly.
If there is no room in the relationship to just grow freely of the complications of an ex, the baby, the money, the relatives, the friends, an abusive childhood, etc. then yes a beautiful fantasy dies and it may never come back. You should never think a person is going to be your cure all!
For many people, they know, starting this year, it is time to bury the fantasy and welcome reality. They must want to do the things that are right for self and the relationship. But where to start? A change of mindset, a reality check! Look at the things in the relationship that is causing it to become unbalanced, miserable, and something you no longer want. If you allow a relationship to grow in a setting free of outside influence, criticism and unresolved issues of the past, how beautiful it can be! Keep in mind, it takes work, lots of it. But if you are in love, and not in lust, it will go the distance.
Nicholl McGuire
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