Wednesday

When You Date Old School, Expect Old School Treatment

When you date older expect your date to have what you might consider some out-dated principles.  There are still some men in this world who believe that a woman's place is at home with children while the man works.  Men who have a faith in God may expect no sex until marriage.  You will find that some older men do have a way of doing things that isn't modern, youthful or even comprehensible to one who is still learning and growing.

Certain family members won't accept you.

As much as we all would like to be accepted by our partner's relatives, it just won't happen.  There will be those in his family that will not go along just to get along especially if they are Christian or have some other belief system.  Your partner may not see anything wrong with cohabitation, but his mother, sister, brother or someone else will.  He may find that having a child out of wedlock isn't a big deal like it once was, but his family or maybe even yours are giving you a firestorm of criticism.  Sometimes it is your special someone who is the one who is against all things deemed immoral while you are more laid back.  Whatever the issue, you will have to respect his faith, uphold your personal views, as well as consider the opinions of those around you.  It also doesn't hurt to consider what people are saying and why they may be reacting negatively about you and your companion being together.  Sometimes relatives simply don't care what you do, but if you have a faith, ask yourself, "What does my Creator think?"

Friends won't find you have much in common with them.

When there is a significant age difference, you will find it challenging to make friends with his friends.  Some women disdain younger women being with older men, because unfortunately they have had their share of cheating partners and disrespectful young women in their presence.  As much as you would like for friends to accept you and act interested in what you have to say, think about this, "Would you really be interested in associating with people 15 or 20 years younger than you?"


Your mature partner may treat you differently than younger dates.

A relationship that may have started off good, may end up being a terrible choice, because you or your mature lover may have allowed far too many voices to influence the way you see one another.  He may start acting distant as if trying to erase his mistake with picking you.  On the other hand, you may stop calling or coming around him, because you know that he too was a bad choice.  When a couple comes to the realization that they may have bit off more than they can chew (when it comes to building a relationship that lasts,) it is best to get out as soon as you can or seriously consider making changes in the relationship that will help it evolve into a marital commitment.  Otherwise, you wait too long and you will find yourself making more and more mistakes that will be harder and harder to fix.  Even worse, some things we do to others, can never be undone and unfortunately we reap the consequences later despite having prayed about them and sought wise counsel.

Be certain that when you date old school, you know the rules of the old school.

Nicholl McGuire

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