Some Boring Older Men: Career First, Fun Never

He was attractive, articulate, and very good in bed, but he was boring. He loved talking about work, but he didn't love talking about going anywhere fun or share his thoughts about life. He had been married before and complained about how the last relationship became routine, boring. Funny, but the same things that bothered him in the last relationship, he was re-creating in the new one.

He sold the young woman on lies that he was a great guy to be around. The truth was most people found him a bit of a recluse, quiet, and at times slightly angry. He liked to go to nice places, travel, and he had the income to back up everything he promised. So the time came for them to get together. At first having sex often kept both distracted, but one day the woman awoke to reality and wanted more than just a penis inside of her, she wanted a man. A Prince Charming, if you will, a fun guy that would take her places, shower her with gifts, and just live a little outside of the bedroom. She told her date about her concerns, he listened with his ears, but did nothing with his feet.

As days together became weeks and weeks turned into years, weekends together didn't change. A movie, sex, breaks for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and do it all over again. Eventually she grew bored with him. She started fantasizing what it would be like to be with someone her own age.

This story is based on true facts. Younger women who complain about boring, older men. What is it about career minded older men that make some so boring anyway? For one, they don't attempt to do anything outside of their comfort zone. They talk alot, but don't deliver. Second, they assume that the woman will plan everything. How can a woman who doesn't have alot of life experience know what makes a man tick especially if her past experiences with men are few? Lastly, they don't educate themselves on the needs of women. How can you keep a woman when you don't bother to act on what you learn from romantic films, women's magazines, and advice from those who are in successful marriages?

The younger woman must be discerning of a man before she chooses to date him much less sleep with him. She must observe what he calls "fun." Ask him what he did last weekend, the weekend before and so on. If there is a pattern of staying home and watching television and she enjoys getting out into the community, then she should know that a future with him will be dull and boring. She should picture days of him coming home from work, plopping down in front of the television, and expecting her to entertain herself without him. Throw children into the mix and she will find that she will be entertaining them most of the time not him.

Some men simply don't know how to do anything more than go to work. They are often tired and prefer to be left alone to do what they want when they want to do it. It isn't any wonder that some of these men are cheated on, their wives leave them, or don't give them sex, etc. Young women should avoid pitying men who tell them that their exs did any of these things to them. Most likely, the ex had her reasons and they just didn't come into being either.

Remember young woman, you are only hearing one side of the story and he will not tell you all the details of what went wrong in the last relationship no matter how much you ask especially if he knows he is guilty.

When a young woman discovers her so-called fun guy is really a dull guy, she has a choice: she can either adjust her interests to suit his lifestyle (which is a bad choice because she is not living her life), she can explain to him how she would like to do more with him and would he honor what he has promised, or she can tell him that she thought he was her match, but unfortunately she has found that he isn't. The older man may take her words into consideration and do more, but then he may be doing some things out of his comfort zone. If he is honest with her, he may say, he is not interested in going places, and prefer to stay home most of the time. But how many older men who are trying to keep a younger woman is going to be truthful? That is why she has to recognize the signs that say he is not her match. The young woman must take initiative and move on, rather than try to be something she is not or make him act in ways that he is not.

Most older men are not interested in doing much but working, watching TV, sleeping, shopping for their interests, occasionally visiting family, and meeting with a few friends every now and then. An active older man with money to spend to travel, explore new places, participate in fun classes, etc. is in the minority! Young women don't be deceived by the men who promise you a life of fun and games. There may be some games -- the kind that play with your mind, so be careful.


Nicholl McGuire
http://www.yourlisten.com/nichollmcguire