Thursday

On Dating an Aging Narcissist

As we get older, we often become more set in our ways. We know what we like and what we don't like, and we can be very stubborn about changing our minds. This can be a good thing in many ways, but it can also make us more resistant to new ideas and experiences.

This can be especially true for the narcissist.   As they age, narcissists can become even more obsessed with their own image and their need for admiration and attention. They may become more critical and judgmental of others, and less able to see things from another person's perspective.

This can make dating a narcissist a challenge, especially if there is a significant age gap between you. Here are some things to keep in mind if you find yourself in this situation.

1. Don't take what they say personally.

The narcissist's need for admiration and attention is not about you. It's about them. They may try to draw you into their world and make you feel like you are the only one who matters, but ultimately, they matter and only they.

2. Be prepared for manipulation.

Narcissists are master manipulators. They will try to control and manipulate you to get what they want. Be aware of their tactics and don't let yourself be drawn into their web.

3. Set boundaries.

Narcissists often have a sense of entitlement and can be very demanding. It's important to set boundaries with them and stick to them. Otherwise, they will take advantage of you.

4. Don't get drawn into their drama.

Narcissists love drama. They thrive on it. Don't get caught up in their games and don't let them use you as a pawn in their dramas.

5. Be assertive.

Narcissists often try to control and dominate others. It's important to be assertive with them and stand up for yourself. Otherwise, they will walk all over you.

6. Don't take their criticism personally.

Narcissists are quick to criticize and find fault with others. It's important not to take their criticism personally. If you do, you will become defensive, and they will use your defensive reactions to control and manipulate you.

7. Don't try to change them.

Narcissists are who they are, and they are not going to change. Don't waste your time and energy trying to change them. It's a fruitless endeavor.

8. Accept them for who they are.

Narcissists are who they are and there is nothing you can do about it. The best thing you can do is accept them for who they are and try to make the best of the situation or walk away and never look back!

9. Don't try to reason with them.

Narcissists are not reasonable people. They will never see your point of view or understand your logic. Trying to reason with them is also a fruitless effort.

10. Set boundaries and stick to them.

Narcissists will try to push your boundaries. They will test you to see how far they can go. It is important that you set boundaries and stick to them. Otherwise, the narcissist will take advantage of you.

11. Don't take their bait.

As mentioned earlier, narcissists are master manipulators. They will try to bait you into arguments and fights. They will try to get a rise out of you. Don't take the bait! Keep your cool and don't let them control you with their games.

12. Don't try to make them love you.

Narcissists are who they are, and love is not what is on their minds when they are involved with you, rather they are more concerned about how you might benefit them financially and sexually.  So, if you think you can somehow buy them everything they want and they will eventually come to love you, that's not happening!  You can't buy love especially when a narcissist has no love to give.  Don’t waste your time and energy trying to get something from a narcissist that they are incapable of giving. It’s a lost cause.

13. Be prepared for the worst.

Narcissists can be very cruel and abusive. They may say and do things that hurt you deeply. It is important that you be prepared for the worst. Have a support system in place so that you can get help if you need it.

14. You may have to leave.

If the narcissist is being abusive, you may have to leave the relationship. It is important to have a safety plan in place so that you can get out quickly and safely if you need to.

15. It's not your fault.

Narcissists can be very convincing. They may try to make you believe that it is your fault that they are the way they are. It is important to remember that it is not your fault. You did not choose to be in a relationship with a narcissist. You are not responsible for their behavior. 

Remember when dating a narcissist, he will be difficult and challenging at times. Second, narcissists age just like everyone else – which means they may become even more difficult to deal with as they get older. Finally, if you are dating a narcissist, it is important to remember that you are not responsible for their behavior. Here are a few more tips on dating an aging narcissist: 

Be prepared for difficult conversations. As narcissist ages, they may become even more difficult to deal with. This means that you need to be prepared for challenging conversations. Be patient and try to understand where they are coming from, even if it is frustrating.

Take care of yourself first. It is important to remember that you are not responsible for the narcissist’s behavior. This means that you need to take care of yourself first and foremost. Make sure to set boundaries and stick to them.

Seek help if needed. If you find yourself struggling to deal with the narcissist, it is important to seek out help from a professional. This can be vital in helping you to deal with the situation in a healthy way.

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