They are out there, men who will say whatever they want to any woman they choose. It doesn't matter that sexual harassment claims are taking our media by storm, the old way of thinking is etched in some of these older men's minds. Like children, some still believe pretty women are seen not heard. The men born prior to the seventies are still among us and still sharing antiquated beliefs with open-minded children and grandchildren.
Haughty men still insist on saying sexually inappropriate things to women, talking about sexual conquests to the same sex and others, sharing and/or giving sexually explicit material to female workers, clients, and even strangers. They laugh off what they do and follow it up with statements like, "Well you know how we are, boys will be boys. Can't you take a joke, why so serious? I can't help myself, but you are gorgeous. You are so fine, I couldn't help but touch that behind! Look at all the women who like me, I am irresistible, I will make you love me!" Some women will nervously chuckle until convicting thoughts and negative feelings take hold of them afterward, "What just happened?" some of these women think. "I can't believe he said that...did that. That's not right."
Whether a woman realizes in that moment or years later that being harassed is unacceptable, the point is, it happened. Something occurred that just wasn't right. A powerful man or a not-so-powerful one crossed the line. It didn't matter that she was single, married, young or old, he had no business forcing his sexual desire/thoughts/deeds. Would sexually inappropriate behavior be okay with him toward his daughter or granddaughter by other lust-filled men? Would he be okay with his wife being disrespected by other men with the promise of fame, fortune and power to follow? Most caring men would say, "No way, I would beat that man's a$$! No one disrespects my mother, sister, daughter...no one!" So why would they think it is okay to do it to another man's kin without consequence? People talk about religious groups forcing their views down people's throats, well what about men and women without any moral compass forcing their ill-intentions and other things down people's throats?
I must admit I am happy but also sad at the same time about what is happening in the media. Happy because the exposure empowers women and changes the mindset of many men who thought daddy and grandaddy's disrespect of women was acceptable. But sad, because this does impact the way a number of men and women's relationships and friendships with one another--some for good and others for evil--it all depends upon the accuser.
Now when you look at the long list of men in the spotlight for hurting women, you can't help but see how some victims also took advantage of the benefits they received from them as well. I guess they looked at it as getting their due payment from the pain, shame, and suffering they endured. Do we ignore the voices of those who agreed to perform some tricks for some treats? Were those women really harrassed or are they looking for a second or even third payout by riding on the #MeToo campaign?
Whether victim or not, the point is men are going to have to re-evaluate their thinking concerning women and teach sons and grandsons too! As much as lovely ladies are quite attractive to view and can be quite kind to you, doesn't mean that it gives any man or woman a license to act disrespectfully toward them. Keep your sexual thoughts and material to yourself. Resist the temptation to want to kiss, hold, squeeze, rape, or stare. Most women simply will not respond in a positive way to a forceful, desperate, lonely or even crazy sort of man hell-bent on getting something for nothing or something for something.
The men, who refuse to change their view of women, and continue to act inappropriate, will sooner or later have their day in court, day in the street, or worse six feet deep. You don't have to be a Hollywood big shot to be on a scorned woman's hit list. She will most likely have the support and protection from the men who love and appreciate her and may God help you if she does. In order to be a target, all you have to be is an arrogant fool with unaddressed sex issues and childhood woes who believes himself to be right even when he is wrong. The long list of names in the media continues to grow and so too are the life lessons. Going forward conduct yourself like gentlemen.
Nicholl McGuire
An age gap dating advice blog that provides valuable tips when dating older men and younger women. Thought-provoking relationship tips for older men seeking to date younger women. Please be advised to seek a professional for serious issues. Contributors are not all licensed or trained in relationship counseling. This blog is not for people under the age of 18.
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