Thursday

What's the Point of Dating Older, Younger if No Longer Into It?

In previous entries I provided a host of information that talks about age gap dating experiences, family woes, health concerns, and more, and yet some will continue to date older or younger even when their hearts or minds are not that into it anymore.

There is a self-deception that occurs with some daters. It goes something like this, "I guess it's okay.  I mean I like her/him.  I really hope things work.  I know I am his/her type.  Besides I have a lot of money...look good, still fit...a great catch!"  Most likely, if the person is displaying signs they don't like you much, you aren't as good as you think.  But it's okay.  You can move on if only you are willing.

I found someone online over a decade ago and I admit that I wasn't really feeling older guys at the time.  I had a history that didn't treat me so nice.  I had made up in my mind at the time that if it didn't work, I wasn't sticking around and I meant it.  When you know you have reached that point when the young lady is annoying you more than pleasing you or the older man is being controlling rather than loving, it's time to make some hard decisions.

I know it can be tough.  One man many years ago I had to let go because I was 19 and he was about 41.  He really didn't do it for me.  I knew there were some insecurities he had like the time when I brushed his hair not realizing that I uncovered his thinning spot.  Irritated he swept it back, "I'm sorry..." I said.  Talk about awkward.  The man in crisis also drank much at times and didn't mind visiting me when he was drunk.  What a waste!  Yeah, that is what I was thinking.  I didn't respect him and neither did he me, because why would he show up drunk?

Anyway, you need established relationship boundaries my friends. Once one, two or more are crossed and you just aren't feeling the fellow or gal, move on.  Don't punish, insult, complain...there's no point in dating older or younger when you have personal hang-ups with age, personality, wit, and more. 

Older people can be boring at times even when they think they are not and younger people can have too much energy...so why complain about the person you picked?  Stick to your own age if dating younger or older is just not working any longer.

Nicholl

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