Sunday

He's Rich, You're Not - So What is the Problem?

Young lady, you don't anticipate any issues when you start off dating a wealthy, older gentleman that has more money than you since you assume you both are in agreement when it comes to your dating arrangement.  You supply the rich man's needs (whatever those might be) and he supplies yours.  But problems do arise when a successful gentleman continues to spend his cash on you while you continue to happily receive.  But what might those issues be?


1.  He will begin to think that you are taking advantage of him.


If too many days go by and you are not holding up your end of the bargain, the older gentleman might think you are taking his kindness for weakness.  He expects that the arrangement you both agreed to will be fair.  If you feel that his demands are too much, you might want to rethink your relationship or arrangement with this individual.


2.  He will assume you're just what others had warned him about, "A gold-digger."


Sometimes guilty feelings have a way of catching up to people.  You will know that someone is whispering something in his ear negative about you and/or the relationship by the way he treats you.  To avoid verbal abuse, blaming, physical harm or anything that might be harmful to you, don't stick around if the guilt-ridden older man has made it plain that he doesn't want to be in the relationship any longer for any number of reasons whether they make sense to you or not.  It is better to escape early on then take someone abusing you verbally or physically due to guilt or shame.


3.  He will act negatively toward you if he should suddenly take an unexpected financial hit.


Some men just don't do well when it comes to spending, saving, or investing money.  Rather than do what is right when it comes to financial planning, they will blame everyone around them hoping to feel better about their mistakes.  If you know you are with someone who pretends to do well with money, but from the looks of things you know different, move on especially when he refuses to listen to sound advice.


4.  He may grow weary of assisting you financially.


When you start to feel like you are a burden to him, don't ask him for anything, create some distance, and plan to create your own wealth.  However, keep this in mind, that if he starts taking from you and you feel unfulfilled, don't hesitate to express how you feel about what he is and isn't doing for you.


5.  He might apply pressure on you to do more with your life.


One way a rich man wants you to stay out of his pocket is to encourage you to better yourself.  From suggesting you go back to college to telling you about an available position at a local company, the older man wants you to make your own money.  This is actually a good thing, because you are able to learn, grow and appreciate life more because you are in control of your own destiny.


As much as a young lady would like to reason that there is nothing wrong with dating a man for his wealth, know that sooner or later his riches will become an issue particularly when you don't have your own.


Nicholl McGuire maintains and contributes to another relationship blog here.

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