Sunday

Are You Really Okay with Your Partner Dating Other People?

Some dates simply don't care what their mates do apart from them.  Couples will enter into mutual agreements where one is married, yet he or she has additional men or women they are having sex, attending events together and doing whatever else they like.  Others will exclusively date for a time until one or both get the bright idea to permit an additional person to enter their relationship.  Whether you agree with this sort of arrangement or not, it exists and some readers just might be their date's Girlfriend #2, 3 or even 4!  Young women will also play the field as well. Some will persuade their older boyfriends to go along with the program when found out.  Then of course, some people are so open and honest about their intentions, you can't help but stand still with your mouth wide open, "You want me to do what?" you might have said.

With so many people having a variety of creative fantasies of what they believe is a "good" relationship, one must know exactly what he or she wants before seriously committing to anyone or dating exclusively.  If you don't know what you want or have no boundaries, then you are one of those individuals who may be leaving yourself wide open for someone else to make up the rules as you get to know the person.

What exactly is the verbal agreement between a couple who really likes one another saying and not saying?  Are there others who are fulfilling your date's additional needs?  Could money and gifts be suffocating how some of you really feel about an arrangement you already agreed to and is now no longer satisfying?  Could the one asked to be a part of a wild relationship, withstand the pressure that might come about especially when people find out about one's lifestyle choice? 

Relatives, children, friends, in-laws, every dater has these connections, what one does with his or her life can potentially affect others.  Not everyone goes along with what the sub-culture does no matter how much the public is brainwashed that everyone is entitled to make their own decisions and "you should be more accepting..."  We all can make whatever choices we want, but are they sincerely the best?  How might family be impacted in the short or long-term if secrets come out?  Sometimes what people think are "just between you and me" end up in someone's photo album, video, audio, or heard about after a former date decided to tell the guys or gals.

If you feel that deep down inside, your unorthodox relationship is just not worth the time or stress anymore, then don't string your older or younger partner along, be at peace and go your own way!  The holidays have a way of amplifying poor decision-making especially when you are the one left alone on Christmas day.

Just something to think about.

Nicholl    

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