Thursday

When Dating Bubbly, Talkative Young Women Just Isn’t Working for You


They are youthful, exciting and have a lot to talk about, young women who laugh more than they cry can make any man fall head over heels in love with them.  But when you are a self-centered mature man, settled—caught up in routines, in time, you will be annoyed with all the energy that some young women bring to the relationship.

At first it doesn’t seem to bother you, her smiling often, but over time you find yourself starting to feel uneasy.  You begin to wonder if there is something wrong with you or maybe with her.  “Can someone be this happy all the time?”  Rather, you should be asking, “Why am I so cranky?”  The young bubbly woman seems so much happier and optimistic about the future, but you, not so much.  

Casting all doubt aside and unresolved issues of the past, face it, you just might not be her type.  Why force a round peg into a square hole?  But what do some mature men do?  Try too hard to impress in the beginning of the relationship only to later become weary and unemotional toward a younger woman’s advances, requests and desire to be heard.  “It’s not her, it’s me…” he should be telling himself.  But years of playing the blame game skews his vision and all he sees is that wide smile that he can’t muster on his face asking him to, “Try this…Why don’t we go there…What’s wrong?” while hearing her irksome laughter in his head. 

Some men just shouldn’t waste a young woman’s time.  Think: she has her life ahead.  Why slow her down with unnecessary requests to get her to change who she is?  “Do you have to talk so much, honey?  Are you always like this so cheery?  I wish I had your energy…” he says.  So she likes to go, go, go and giggle, giggle, giggle.  Isn’t that what you liked about her?  Why expect her to be anything different?  Maybe you use to be young and fun once, but these days that just isn’t you.  Why not be the bigger person and end the relationship so that you can find someone with less energy, you know someone more like yourself.  Don’t worry over making her cry.  Besides, she might be thinking, “He is such a grumpy man.  Wonder how I can get out of this one?”  

There are those men who just don’t get it when it comes to dating younger women, one size (personality) doesn’t fit all.  No matter how many relatives, friends, co-workers, talk shows, articles, and more that are out there that scream at you, “Stay away from younger women, you are no match for them” some men will try to date them anyway.  Men, who just aren’t out-going and don’t like to do much but work and periodically have sex should stick to their own age group or alone especially if the slightest remark, question, or joke bothers them.  Most menopausal single women get it, that’s why some prefer to be alone.  They avoid both young and older men.  “It’s just too much work to date,” some say.  

Far too many young women have had their poor hearts broken waiting for some mature men to get their act together.  They sold them a good sales pitch in the beginning of the dating relationship only to let these women down, shame on them!  Unfortunately, some of these young women overlooked the old adage which says, “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks” too!
When you know you have a long pattern of reckless dating and many stories that include phrases such as:  “I didn’t like…couldn’t get along…wish things were different…” it’s time to take that pause in one’s life and ask yourself this question, “What the #$%^ am I doing?”  I’m sure the women your own age were thinking the same thing.

Nicholl McGuire

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