Wednesday

One of the Worst Mistakes a Young Woman Makes When Dating Older Men

I was thinking about one of the worst mistakes I made as well as other young women that I have known over the years who have dated someone older. The worst mistake we made was trust that everything an older, married man tells you is truth.

Gullible young women who want to be loved fall for the old, "I don't love my wife" trick.  They assume that the relationship between the older man and his ex is emotionally and physically over after 10 plus years and that somehow the once loyal, married older man is now in love with the younger woman.  Not so fast!  Even if he isn't sleeping with that older woman that he has left behind, doesn't mean that his heart is over her.

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Young women want older men who can love them the way they want to be loved.  These women have had bad experiences with young, immature men.  What a breath of fresh air when the young woman finds an older man who sincerely loves her even if he is still married!  However, beware that there are some married men who just need a temporary distraction, something that will make them forget about their future ex who just so happens to be the mother of their children, a business partner, or an on again off again lover.

Young women, don't allow yourselves to be caught in a married man's lies!  "I don't love her...we never have sex...I wasn't sleeping with her...I don't visit her...we don't talk on the phone...I'm going to divorce her and marry you...I love you...we have so much in common..."

The deceptive, older man manipulates his words to get you to perform in ways that he wants.  If he desires to date you and wants you to date him exclusively, then he will make himself more available to you and he might give you some money and gifts to keep you interested.  If he wants sex from you, then he will test you to see how much work he might have to put in to get you to go to bed with him.  Meanwhile, his heart may be reserved for that woman he left who helped him raise children, build a business, invest in property, and more.  You might recall the deceptive, older man say something to you like, "I broke up with the ex because we no longer got along, she was boring...didn't appreciate me...always argued...cheated."  Sure, and he never did anything wrong always said, "please and thank you."  Don't fall for it!

One day that older man is going to realize that he would have been better off with the wife of his youth; rather than try to get a new one to preserve his youth and that's when hearts will be broken.  Don't be gullible!  Young women, watch more and talk less when dealing with an older man and never trust everything he says as truth until proven otherwise.

Nicholl McGuire
Author of Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate

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