Thursday

Plenty of Reasons Why Older Men Date Younger Women, But Middle-Age Issues Live On

So older men date younger women for a variety of reasons from Boaz marrying Ruth to protect a family name to a relative simply liking a young lady and wanting to take care of her--no big deal, right?  Right.  But what if upon closer inspection some of those male mid-life blues start to show up coupled with issues he has carried from the last relationship with a menopausal woman, now what?  The young woman has her work cut out for her--that's what!  She has to be strong, focused, love herself, determined to make the relationship work (that is if she loves her partner) and have a support system that will advise her when things don't look good in the relationship.

I thought of this topic yet again (already wrote about it in the past on other sites and this one) as to why a man dates younger when I noticed many middle-aged women (both on and offline) behaving immaturely (ie. dressing inappropriately, cursing, fighting unnecessarily with partners)--purposely acting like young women in an attempt to keep their man's attention.  However, deep inside these middle-aged women feel jilted, angry, and jealous about the relationship between those "cradle-robbers," as they put it, and " young thangs."  These women's snarky comments, reveal a lot about their insecurities, unresolved issues, and more.

Men who date younger have spoken online and other places saying, "they don't like to feel old, menopausal women make them feel old."  I guess if one complains often about their aches it can be a turn-off.  I have heard menopausal women share a long list of issues with their co-workers about things like: vaginal dryness, weight gain, mood disorders--you name it!  So if they are talking about these things at work, I can only imagine how much more they are sharing with partners!

I would also assume that if a woman isn't taking care of herself both inside and out, her man is going to stray.  He is not going to keep being understanding if his wife/girlfriend keeps telling him, "I'm sorry I can't have sex tonight...these hot flashes are killing me...don't touch me.  Leave me alone!"   A weak man is going to eventually lust or look for a woman who he hopes will make him feel better than the last.  He is going to watch for the woman who doesn't have as many women issues as those who are more mature.  Remember,the old adage, "You can't teach an old dog new tricks?"  This is also true for the mature women as well.   

Some mature men grow weary of telling so-called responsible women (both young and old) to take care of themselves.  Notice I didn't say all.  From smelly (you know what) to managing money, women who don't take heed to advice that their mother may have told them or should have, will not keep any man around for long!   

Being that I am not middle-aged yet and not considered youthful either by societal standards, I can date men both young and old (since my face and body at times is deceiving for some),  I am personally indifferent to the topic of dating older and younger now that I am headed for the big 40, yet I do like to write about it and share my observations.  But really, who are the individuals who get a rise when the topic of older men, dating younger women arises?  Scorned middle-aged mothers and daughters, they care.  "Dad left mom for a younger woman who's like my age, wtf!?"  Her mom yells, "Go back to that baby, you call a girlfriend, Pig, Chester the Molester!"

These women care a whole lot!  The insecure wife is often left alone while her husband plays with the twenty-something year olds who could care less that the man is married.  Mom, on low self-esteem, hurts inside because she once looked a certain way and now thanks to society, she is forced to try to work on a face that is no longer holding make-up well.  She despises her body shape and will often comment about others being "...so small...Look at her...I wish I had her body..."  Meanwhile, her daughter just doesn't see men in the same way.  She wonders what the future holds.  She is angered that the young lady is old enough to be her friend.  She thinks, "Why is my dad so stupid?"  Hormones played an impact on dad's decision-making especially if the young woman is old enough to be his daughter.  Sure, there were other reasons that made him like the girl, but most assuredly a mentally stable man, who has a relatively good life and his relationship has very few issues, is not going to suddenly abandon it for a young woman.  But unstable men do it all the time and cover up the true reasons with a barrage of mainstream excuses.  The ignorant overlook the deception and don't bother to think deeply about the topic.  "So it happens, old guy, young lady, who cares?"  They dismiss all reasoning; instead, some just say,  "S$%t happens."  While they move on, middle-age issues live on.

Nicholl McGuire
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