What are our views on dating someone who is about ten and more years older than us? Is it an issue we focus on? Is age the issue or do we look at the mechanics of the man involved?
In my philosophy of thinking, age is just a number. It doesn’t attach itself to any man thing, or importance. There are mature men at fifty, and there are immature men at sixty. Where does that leave us?
I dated a man who was eleven years older than me, and it was great for the moment. The man had wisdom all over the place. It got to a point that he was taking his wisdom and running all over the place with it, and driving me to drink. I was truly in need of a Matai and then some.
The fact that he was so much older than me he thought he had the key to the world and then some. He treated me like I was his daughter, and he was my father. We also have to realize that a man who is ten years older than someone is under the assumption that he’s the king of the castle, and you will worship the ground he spit on. I think not!
My man was living in the 21st century, but he was still hibernating in the prehistoric days where the dinosaurs ruled the world and then some. He had this concept that men were still the chief at arms, and when I say do something, or don’t do something, you obey, follow, and give me the respect I deserve and then some. I knew at this precise moment that my man was going to be my eliminated man.
Now don’t get me wrong because my man had some perks which attracted me to him, but the issues of being the dominant factor in the relationship bordered on the ridiculous and then some.
1. No one told me what to do because I was truly a grown woman.
2. There were no masters and kings in this day and age.
3. The man and woman are on equal levels.
4. Respect is given and received.
5. You are not my father, and I am not your mother.
An older man is stuck in his ways and this is an understatement thank you very much. He was built with these factors, and no amount of loving, good sex, convincing and persuading will change his mind. It was going to be his way, and if you think that you can change a man, then forget about it. No amount of anything would change his mind. If you gave him one million dollars, you still wouldn’t be able to float his boat around to your thinking. It was truly out of the question.
My concept on older men is that they are wiser in the ways of the world, but they have their faults just like men my age, and younger men. Older men are more established in their employment, and money. My man had just retired from the CTA, so he was bent on doing some of the things he loved doing, but couldn’t do because he was working. Of course my retired man got exhausted, and he ended up going back to work on a part-time basis.
So would you date an older man? I think it depends on the man and not the age of the man. It also depends on the level of your competence in this relationship.
1. Are you willing to handle an older man and his faults?
2. Are you okay with his domination?
3. Are you contented with him treating you like a child, or his daughter?
4. Can you live with his prehistoric ways?
5. Is he sweet, loving, and kind, and you can over look his faults?
6. Do you love him?
7. Does he love you?
8. Is the relationship going anywhere?
9. Is marriage down the line?
10. Does he treat you like a queen?
If you answered yes to most of these questions, or all of them, then your older man is worth it and then some. Forget about his mindless ways, and celebrate the loving he brings to your relationship. Remember age is only a number, and what do we really care about numbers? Sisters we want the love of a good man, and older men bring it on. I think I can handle you.
By Carol Ann Culbert Johnson
I am 43 years old, and my passion is writing. I love it. Please check out my website at http://www.freewebs.com/jcarolann and enjoy the ride
An age gap dating advice blog that provides valuable tips when dating older men and younger women. Thought-provoking relationship tips for older men seeking to date younger women. Please be advised to seek a professional for serious issues. Contributors are not all licensed or trained in relationship counseling. This blog is not for people under the age of 18.
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