The Narcissistic Relationship - Its Not You


Tempted to Strike Back? The Abused Older Guy and His Crazy Young Girlfriend

Young, fiesty, and strong, the young woman hit her older partner for the third time this week.  He cursed at her each time, threatened to beat her down if she hit him again, and so she did and then again and again while kicking him with her high-heel shoes.  The thought of going to jail flashed through the man's mind.  "I'm too old for this," he thought.  His girlfriend got away with being physically abusive yet again.  He waited until she calmed down then asked her to leave.  She yelled, cried, and made promises not to do it again.  The older gentleman was fed up!

No matter how beautiful, talented, or how much you invested in the young woman, no man deserves to be abused!  You might feel ashamed, angry, depressed, or even bitter, but keeping this toxic woman around will only get worse.  Some men, who have suffered abuse like black and blue marks on their faces to bites in undisclosed locations, have kept episodes of abuse silent.  Instead, they drink alcohol or use drugs to numb their pain.  Others will find calmer women to date while keeping the "crazy b#tch" around.

If you are in a bad relationship right now or are attempting to recover from one, there are helpful resources as follows:

1.  Heart to Heart Living Empowering Men
2.  Battered Men: Men's Personal Stories
3.  Hidden Hurt for Men in the UK
4.  Web MD: Help for Battered Men

For more useful websites go here.

Nicholl McGuire also maintains a blog entitled, Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate, see here.


No Love, Just Sex - She Knows You are Living Out a Fantasy

For some young, single women, busy with careers and their social lives, they really aren't interested in a serious relationship despite what some older men might think.  Although there are those mature men who are all-too-eager to bed, wed, or share their wealth with beautiful young women, some of these ladies just aren't interested no matter what you promise or do for them.

There is no need trying to rack one's brain trying to figure out why some of these women, don't want a steady, older boyfriend.  Educated women know about things like: andropause, adultery, jealousy, former partners, adult sons and daughters, and other challenges that come with dating someone older and they just can't imagine being with an older man long-term. 

Mature men, who consider themselves still young physically and mentally, just can't fathom why they can't seem to connect with certain young women.  Instead of taking rejection personally, accept the fact that some women, whether old or young, just aren't going to want anything more than a brief conversation, possibly sex, and so life goes on. 

Some men have a need to relive a time in their lives where they were sought after and someone genuinely loved them, but things change.  Whatever an older gentleman once had in his previous life with someone else, far too many life disappointments have a way of tarnishing what once was and so for some men, they chase a dream of what could be.  Rather than facing  reality, some older singles create a fantasy in their minds with someone younger while hoping to relive emotions from their youth.  They seek to find someone special and when they do, they plan to tie her down, so to speak. 

Young women can detect when a man is desperate to find and keep a fantasy; therefore, these discerning women might give up sex, but not much else.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Laboring to Love Myself and writes articles about a wide variety of subjects including family challenges.     

No Sugar-Coating the Truth: Married and Dating The Father's Daughter

A parent has every right to be concerned when it comes to his twenty-something daughter being approached by a man his own age or older.  Let's face it, with so many music videos, television series, movies, and other media marketing young, fit, attractive looking women, an older man is going to flirt with the idea of dating a younger woman at some point in his life.

These young women that we see holding hands with rich men, old enough to be their fathers, are daughters.  Somehow something went amiss personally for these young women; therefore, that older partner, who spends time with his young lover, is fulfilling a void or many voids that men her own age just can't do for her.  From a workaholic father to an alcoholic one, the daughter who has grown up with these type of male figures, want to experience love and she just might not care who or what it comes from.  Age and looks mean nothing to a young woman desperate to find love.

Unfortunately for the married, older women, who are working hard to keep their mature partners with them, the competition can be fierce and get quite ugly when one has been jilted by a cheating partner for many years.  The young woman just might find herself in a situation where she will need the help from parents, counselors, and others, because she got in over her head when involving herself with a married man.  

These wayward, married spouses or single men in temporary relationships sometimes find themselves conversing with younger women in the hopes that they find them attractive enough to be more than friends.  When in the presence of a beautiful woman, some men forget about the responsibilities that await them at home.  Finding young women, who actually like these older men, is like a dream come true for them.  An older man might recall his youthful days when a certain type of girl or woman was out of his league, but now that he is successful, he might reason that the risk far outweighs everything else.  "If only I could have her..." he tells himself. 

For some of these young, niave women they become nothing more than prey.  They aren't necessarily wife material.  They aren't emotionally mature for a relationship.  They have little money to handle existing responsibilities much less be a partner's helpmate.  All of which a father knows about his daughters.  These immature youthful women lack understanding on what it truly means to be in a committed relationship.  They are also ill-equipped when it comes to looking beyond self and making sacrifices.  However, when it comes to bedroom experiences and being a mature man's companion, they typically don't fall short.  This is what drives a father and any other male the young woman is connected to crazy!  The thought that an old man is sleeping with their young daughter/niece/cousin creeps some mature men out!  In their minds, they can't imagine sleeping with a young woman.  It isn't any wonder why some older men find it difficult even impossible to have any relationship with a select young woman.  No matter what you say or do, you will never be good enough for a father's daughter especially if your intentions are temporal or with hidden motives.

I must admit in my personal life, I have been influenced by well-meaning family members and friends who wanted nothing but the best for me even if it meant selling one's soul, so to speak.  If more family members would motivate these young daughters to make wiser decisions when it comes to dating, not just for financial reasons, but also for deep, moral convictions, maybe there wouldn't be so many young women making themselves available to older, married men.

Nicholl McGuire



Sugar Baby Owed Her Sugar Daddy, Killed Her Husband

A Sugar Baby from Arizona met her Sugar Daddy on an online website.  The man had loaned her over $300,000.  When it was time to pay him back, this Sugar Baby decided to create an insurance scheme where she murders her husband, receives money from the policy, and then would pay off her loan to the Sugar Daddy.  Of course, her plan of making up false stories of abuse against the husband as well as another story about her husband being attacked by a stranger, etc. didn't pan out and now she is sentenced to life.  The wife killed her husband with a hammer.  Read more here. 

Evidently, the Sugar Baby didn't want to have the typical mutually beneficial relationship that most Sugar Daddy and Sugar Baby arrangements are made of.  Why enter into a loan agreement when she knew she didn't have the money to begin with?  Why would a Sugar Daddy even go along with such an agreement?  He was aware of the woman's plan to do away with her husband.

If there is any takeaway from this tragic story is don't promise anything that you can't payback or give up.  Maybe the woman reasoned a loan would be better than having to sleep with the Sugar Daddy since she was married.  However, what could have been a simple agreement or no agreement at all ended up costing a man his life.

Nicholl McGuire

Emotional Abuse and how to move forward from it

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